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From: stevenso@Apple.COM (David Stevenson)
Newsgroups: alt.flame,alt.sex.bondage
Subject: Re: THE SACRIFICE (of the English Language)
Keywords: forwarded, don't blame the messenger.
Message-ID: <37873@apple.Apple.COM>
Date: 16 Jan 90 21:15:13 GMT
References: <408@danish.UUCP>
Organization: Apple Computer Inc, Cupertino, CA
Lines: 13

As storytelling, the main problem with The Sacrifice is that Satanism is the
main character, periodically lunging into the narrative, huffing and puffing and
shoving the real characters aside.  At best this breaks the narrative flow (a 
bad thing) and at worst it alienates the reader (a very bad thing).  It is very
difficult, if not impossible, to write a successful story about an -ism.  That
doesn't mean someone can't enjoy trying (as Mr. Bond did), nor that others
won't enjoy reading the result (as many have), but it can't be surprising when
a frustrated reader reacts to the freaky Capitalization and wordspaceelision,
since when the narrative flow breaks, the mind wanders to the mechanism of story
crafting.

As a footnote, I actually enjoyed Mr. Cavanaugh's critique more than Mr. Bond's
story--not that one had more intrinsic value than the other.