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From: podop01@bingsunl.cc.binghamton.edu (Pod Operator)
Newsgroups: alt.sex
Subject: Re: A Question of Attraction **read this article!**
Message-ID: <2789@bingvaxu.cc.binghamton.edu>
Date: 16 Jan 90 17:48:53 GMT
References: <77483@psuecl.bitnet>
Sender: usenet@bingvaxu.cc.binghamton.edu
Reply-To: podop01@bingsunl.cc.binghamton.edu (Pod Operator)
Organization: SUNY Binghamton
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In article <77483@psuecl.bitnet>, cau@psuecl.bitnet writes:


> Who prefers the lights on while having sex?

Hm...my SO does, usually.  I don't mind either.

> (A rapidly fired off question to get everybody in the mood.)
> Alright, Hello people. This is my problem:
> I am male, 5'11", 210 lbs, 48" shoulders, brown hair, hazel eyes, and am
> afflicted with that most horrible of horribles, I am a nnice guy."
> 
>   Yes, it's true. If I am interested in a female, we begin to talk, and
> I get more interested, sexually. In most cases, the girl starts to see me
> as a friend she can tell ANYTHING. (you are all thinking, great. that's
> nice. wow. so what? Well it gets better)
>    Now I have several friends who are girls who dump their problems on me,
> and when I try to tell them some of my depression over not having any female
> relationships, they brush it off.  One girl actually had the nerve to say
> after i was bitching about being alone: "I want to go home and fuck my
> boyfriend." And she knew I was mad and wouldn't appreciate a comment like
> that, BUT said it anyway.
> 
> Now, being oversexed as I am, this is very frustrating. I am attractive
> as a friend, not as a lover.
> How can I become more "attractive" in the latter sense? Ladies, your comments
> will be extremely helpful. Please reply.
> 
> 
> Chad Underkoffler
> AMRA


Chad--

     I've seen this problem a lot.  I live in an apartment with 4 guys
and a girl (me being the
other female in the house).  Two of the guys and both of us girls have
SO's.  The other two are
despondent over the fact that women like them as friends, and not as
lovers.  I have different
feelings for both of the single men:  One, I think is one of the most
interesting people I have
ever met, but I am not physically attracted to him in the least.  The
other is a very nice guy, and
kinda cute, to boot.  Both of them have asked me advice on how to get
women to like them
romantically.  I'll tell you what I've told them.

     There really isn't much you can do to change the way women look at
you.  You said you meet women
and they like you as a good friend.  That's actually a good thing. 
Sometimes a friendship can blossom
into something more.  My current SO became my best friend when I
transferred to this school and eventually
became my housemate.  During the time we lived together, our friendship
grew more and more until one
night he kissed me, and it was all over.  I'm madly in love with him,
and he still is my best friend.
I think that a lover who is also a friend is the best kind! :-)

	Just be your own, wonderful self, and someone will get to know you and
fall in love with you.
Good luck!!!!!!

          --Saavik
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			Saavik / Jana Wachsler
     podop01@bingvaxu.cc.binghamton.edu | podop01@bingvaxa.BITNET
     podop01@bingsuns.pod.binghamton.edu | vyxxxx@bingvaxa.BITNET
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		       "But he's so....human."
		     "Nobody's perfect, Saavik."