Path: utzoo!utgpu!news-server.csri.toronto.edu!clyde.concordia.ca!uunet!cs.utexas.edu!usc!rutgers!aramis.rutgers.edu!athos.rutgers.edu!christian From: randall@sidd.sandiego.ncr.com Newsgroups: soc.religion.christian Subject: Anger & Dating for the first time: Message-ID: Date: 20 Aug 90 02:20:10 GMT Sender: hedrick@athos.rutgers.edu Organization: NCR Corporation, Rancho Bernardo Lines: 46 Approved: christian@aramis.rutgers.edu Charles, I am posting to you, to get this off my mind... Has this happened to anyone lately? I am a 39 year old man, just starting to date now, as I have "kept myself pure" for that special person. Actually I am finding out that most normal people have already married, settled down and are raising children. Basically, I am wrestling with thoughts that I have spent all those 18-21 years for nothing; thoughts that all that's left out there are psychological misfits; thoughts of anger with legalistic authority that closets people away from developing normal social relationships, under the guise of "holiness and purity". I feel cheated and deceived, thinking that I was doing the right thing by praying for hours on end, living a very chaste and pure life, giving tithes and offerings, attending church morning, noon, and night. Like Paul, I could say that I came from the strictest sect of the Pharisees, and did everything right by the Book. But having had a very bad anxiety attack a month ago, watching my brother's children date now, and having no person at all in my life, despite the fact that I was a worship team member in a small church, have lots of married couples as friends, well liked by the pastors, prayed literally hours on end to meet that special person, etc, etc, I feel that I have been led down the primrose path into monastic monkhood and celibalistic stupidity. Can anyone help me overcome my feelings of anger towards do-gooder Christians who are only too eager to spew advice at a moments notice and closet people for 15-20 years with bad teaching? (I can supply names of such who were adversely affected) I find my trust of Christian authorities to be diminishing. Why should I respect someone whose advice screws up my life? They don't seem to want to take responsibility afterwords for their effects of their words. Anyone care to make some comments or offer non-Jobian advice? Care to help me overcome my anger which could become resentment and bitterness? Please don't give me that crap about "godliness with contentment", please be real! Thanks, for letting me get out my inner feelings. Help me not feel cheated, deceived, duped, and used. Thanks, again. - Randall (who's beginning to know why the world isn't impressed by Christians) btw: I have prayed to my heavenly Father, and he knows my feelings. -- NCR E & M - San Diego | INTERNET - Randall.Rathbun@SanDiego.NCR.COM 16550 W Bernardo Drive | UUCP - {backbone}!ncr-sd!thor!randall San Diego, CA 92127 | TELE # - (USA) (619) 485-3620 or 2358