Path: utzoo!censor!geac!torsqnt!news-server.csri.toronto.edu!cs.utexas.edu!samsung!emory!att!rutgers!dimacs.rutgers.edu!aramis.rutgers.edu!athos.rutgers.edu!christian From: keith@uunet.Jpl.Nasa.Gov (Keith McIntyre) Newsgroups: soc.religion.christian Subject: Re: intermarraige Message-ID: Date: 30 Nov 90 09:55:54 GMT Sender: hedrick@athos.rutgers.edu Lines: 32 Approved: christian@aramis.rutgers.edu > I'm a Jewish guy with a question about how intermarraiges are handled > these days. If you have experience with this situation, I would greatly > appreciate you sharing your views with me, as I am very confused about it. I am Gentile by heritage and my wife is Jewish, the reverse of what you are dealing with, but I can sympathize. > I have attended two intermarraige weddings, both of them between male > Jewish friends and Catholics. The first was handled simply in a courtroom > by a JP without any denominational references. The parents could not > resolve their problem, the couple didn't want to bother arguing about it > anymore, so they just kept it simple. This is the solution that we used. We were married in the house that I owned at the time. The only witnesses were the JP and another married couple that we knew. > Now, I know Josh, and he is a wimp. He does not think much of his parents > and probably does not realize how seriously he dishonered them by repeating > his vows with Christian wording. But could he have retained a Rabbi and > a Priest to do a dual-demoninational wedding? Is there a resolution? Neither of us were wimps, but we knew this was an explosive situation. My wife's mother still didn't speak to my wife for several months after the wedding and my mother-in-law and I weren't on good terms for over a year. Other reactions from my wife's family were similar. We were married when both of us were not the least bit religious. Since then we have both become very committed Christians. In retrospect I still think that the JP solution caused the least grief of all the options. May God guide your decisions on this matter - it can be very rough. I would fear that a dual denominational wedding would just insult everyone, but only you can make that decision.