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From: Betty.J.@p10.f642.n105.z1.fidonet.org (Betty J.)
Newsgroups: misc.handicap
Subject: adapting
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Date: 31 Jan 91 20:58:04 GMT
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PN>     Hi Betty and Rob, planning wisely for the future is not the same as
PN> really being a worrier.  With disabilities that is the only way to go.
 
In the beginning I couldn't get Rob to talk about Adam's future special needs 
his response was "We'll deal with it when it comes up".  He is beginning to 
see that that will be to late in some instances.
 
PN> I'm not sure on how much of a crossover help will apply to your son for 
PN> coping with his school and social skills. I realize that people view those
PN> of short stature differently as the also deal with other disabilities. 
PN> One of the things that I have noticed is that short people are viewed as
PN> "cute" and childlike as opposed to us in wheelchairs that are preceived as
PN> totally dibilitated.
 
I'm finding that there is alot of crossover when it comes to other people's 
percetion of a difference, or not "normal".  Cute & childlike is great when 
you're a 4 y/o like Adam, but I've talked to several short statured adults that 
are constantly fighting that perception in the workplace. 
 
PN> One way that comes to mind to help him in the future is to
PN> teach him how to be very independent and responsible. One way of doing 
PN> this is to do modifications to the home so that he has access to 
PN> everything and teach him how to help and work at home. A low work counter
PN> in the kitchen
 
We haven't made any permanant modifications to our house, but we try to make
Adam as independent as possible: booster steps everywhere, light switch and 
doorknob extenders, a turntable in the bathroom so the glass, soap, etc. 
isn't out of reach. We just recently installed the light switch extenders and 
he is driving us crazy with his new independence turning lights off & on! 
 
For awhile when he didn't want to do something (like pick up his toys) his 
response was "I'm not big enough" - that didn't get him anywhere so he's 
dropped it, but has a few other 4 y/o excuses why he can't.
 
PN> If you are secure and have a sense of your
PN> own worth than no one can really hassle you or put you down. 
 
I like that.
 
PN>      I only know of one other group that deals with dwarfism and that is
PN> the Billy Barty Foundation Inc.
 
We have recieved some information from them & purchased a wonderful 
music video from them called "From Where I Stand".
 
Thanks for the welcome & suggestions.  We look forward to hearing from you 
again. 
 
 
                                ROB & BETTY JACOBSEN
 
 

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