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From: Vixen@f11.n203.z1.fidonet.org (Vixen)
Newsgroups: misc.handicap
Subject: PLUGGING ME IN
Message-ID: <18939@bunker.isc-br.com>
Date: 23 Apr 91 19:22:52 GMT
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Index Number: 15117

[This is from the Silent Talk Conference]

Hi Jack,

Well, last weekend I went to a party jam session. I "thought" I
might be okay because it was all going to be loud amplified rock
and roll. I attempted this using no other special equipment, just
wearing my BTEs and my Telex.

I sang and played bass on the first three songs of the Jam. Since
everyone had to "follow me" my not hearing was'nt that much of a
problem. (And so I told by the people there) even though I could'nt
"hear me."

So, I was thinking, "Hey, this is pretty cool, my ears my be all
wired up to junk, but I am playing and singing anyway and it went
over well!

Unfortunately, after that, it was time for the others to think up
tunes and jams and to "Play along with them."  Disaster time!

The only way I can describe how it sounded to me is to say it was
probably what it would be like if you took someone into a room,
with seven stereos playing seven different songs at the same time
at full volume!

I did'nt know what I was hearing or who was doing what, the music
was more like this big loud hum than recognizable music and it was
a "big mess" for me!

Not only that, in quiter moments, I would ask, "is my guitar loud
enough" and be told yes, definitely, but "I" could'nt hear it at
all. It was horrible and I was growing more frustrated by the
minute. I could'nt recognize anything much at all.

I tried switching to drums (I am good player.) because I thought, I
will be the one setting the time, but I could'nt hear past the end
of the snare drum.

Anyway, to be very honest, I gave up, I was hurting and feeling
pretty nad for myself and I was glad I had my big dark glasses on!!
I packed up and went home pretty quick. I was'nt "at all"
emtionally prepared for happened and I am still a bit upset.
(Although, I am not vrying in my beer at the moment!) Besides, I
hate beer!

Bonnies says, she thinks she can try to replace my bad frequencies
by using an equilizer and handphones. For exmaple, she has a dual
fifteen band equalizer that she would like to try to expriment with
on me. Although, she still wants me to take my BTEs off. But she
did say that those frequencies that I simply do not have, she
cannot replace.

I keep thinking that maybe her plan is fine but she should'bt be
thinking in terms of taking my BTEs off! This makes think that she
is still thinking in terms of, "Well, if I just make these
frequencies louder for Vixen, then she will hear and understand
them." I have always understod that my hearing loss is'nt that
simple?

I think Bonnie may want to approach things this waay because I do
have residual hearing and do quite well with my aids and things. I
don't think she understands that even the things I can hear in my
better ear without an aid on it is pretty lousy and I am starining
to hear!

Or perhaps her intent is to make a "giant hearing aid" out of her
electronic gizmos and headphones. And she does want to do as you
have suggested, set withever gizmo she comes up with to the curves
or whatever you call them on a recent audiogram.

Does any of this make sense to you? I know Bonnie knows quite a lot
about sound and acoustics and electronics but I think people here,
like you, understand more about hearing loss! Maybe I need to get
you and her trading mesages!

Well, sorry to ramble on, hope you understand.

Keepin' the faith!

.                            Vixen

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