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From: mrm@sceard.Sceard.COM (M.R.Murphy)
Newsgroups: news.admin,news.software.b
Subject: Re: Really funny jokes being missed
Message-ID: <1991May31.145603.10105@sceard.Sceard.COM>
Date: 31 May 91 14:56:03 GMT
References: <1991May28.203010.16135@mp.cs.niu.edu> <T6mR328w164w@mantis.co.uk>
Reply-To: mrm@Sceard.COM (M.R.Murphy)
Organization: The Mole and Badger Association of Northern San Diego County
Lines: 50

In article <T6mR328w164w@mantis.co.uk> mathew@mantis.co.uk (CNEWS MUST DIE!) writes:
>
>But C News is the program which is meting out the punishment!
>
>Or is it "only following orders", as the famous saying goes?

mathew, this is the way you do it.

  0) You decide you want to use USENET.
  1) You install News software.
  2) You post an article with a distribution limited either by the Distribution:
     header or the Newsgroups: header so that the article will be seen only at
     your local site. You do this to avoid looking the fool. You inspect the
     article that was posted with the tools that you have for looking at
     articles. This includes a text editor that doesn't hide headers. You look
     at logs. You look for errors.
  3) You repeat 2) until you are satisfied that your postings are not pond scum.
  4) You post an article with a distribution limited either by the Distribution:
     header or the Newsgroups: header so that the article will be seen only at
     your local site and a single site that you feed. This is usually done by
     posting to a newsgroup like "to.othersite". You inspect the article that
     was posted with the tools that you have for looking at articles. You look
     at logs. You look for errors. You ask that the administrator at the site
     that you feed do the same.
  5) You repeat 4) until you are satisfied that your postings are not pond scum.
  6) You repeat 4) and 5) for each of the sites that you feed.
  7) You post to a regional test group or to misc.test with limited distribution
     You phrase your posting so that it asks for help rather than demands help.
  8) You wait for some responses from autoresponse daemons and friendly
     administrators.
  9) If you don't get responses, you ask the sites you feed and that feed you
     for help. Nicely.
 10) If you change your software or add a feed, you repeat 2)-9), as required.
 11) If you want to know how far you get, post to misc.test with an unlimited
     distribution. You are allowed to do this with reasonable frequency to
     see if your software and your connectivity are unimpaired. If something
     changes, such that you are dissatisfied, repeat 10) as though your
     software had changed.
 12) If you really want to know how far you get, post to news.admin with an
     unlimited distribution and espouse silly ideas.
 13) If you want even more response, post a chain letter. Ask for money. Or for
     post cards. Do it in alt.flame or talk.bizarre. Ask for a cannonical list
     of COBOL jokes. Do it in alt.folklore.computers. Crosspost to talk.bizarre.
 14) For still more response, irritate someone with an impaired restraint gland
     so that they'll forge a sendsys that points to you. Or send out your own.
     Or rethink 0) :-).

Good luck.
-- 
Mike Murphy  mrm@Sceard.COM  ucsd!sceard!mrm  +1 619 598 5874