From: utzoo!decvax!harpo!npoiv!npois!cbosgd!nscs!rmas70!cly
Newsgroups: net.singles
Title: declaration of undependence
Article-I.D.: rmas70.240
Posted: Tue Nov 30 09:56:13 1982
Received: Wed Dec  1 07:21:46 1982

This is from Susan Deitz who writes an advice column for singles.
I think it came out in conjunction with naional single's week.
Someone who had been in one of my small group discussions
at the single group (subject was independence) mailed it to me.
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		"THE DECLARATION OF UNDEPENDENCE"
I RESOLVE to think for myself in all situations rather than allow an "expert"
to decide the course of my life. While I will remain open to wise counsel, I
will make the final decision in personal matters and make myself heard
when there are shared decisions to be made.

I RESOLVE to remain aware of my identity and my wholeness at all times,
particularly when in a coupled relationship. I will exercise my need
for personal space without impinging on others.

I RESOLVE to be a loving friend and to nurture worthwhile friendships,
realizing my self-sufficiency is not equivalet to isolation. I will
cultivate relationships with those of all ages, occupations and marital 
statuses as long as they meet my needs.

I RESOLVE to become acquainted with the other gender burdened with a
minimum of bias, recognizing they are neither alien nor enemy. I will focus
on our similarities and develop real relationships with them, establishing
authentic intimacy rather than superficial sexuality.

I RESOLVE to plan my own life for myself insofar as is possible: career
goals, family future, my personal ambitions to develop and grow.

I RESOLVE to make of my single status an incidental fact. I will remember
that first of all, I am a distinct and unique person that happens to be
unmarried. There are times when being single is an advantage, and others
when it is not. Yet when I consider myself in a total picture, marital
status will not be a prime consideration. Involvement will.

I RESOLVE to go with my occasioal loneliness, remembering not to flee
nor wallow nor make impulsive decisions in the midst of it. I will bear
in mind that everyone feels momentary twinges of loneliness, whether
married or sinle; it may well be a dimension of humanness. I will make it
a point to note the difference between loneliness and aloneness, 
appreciating that being in my own company can be a wise choice.

I RESOLVE to maximize the possibilities for growth and freedom within my
singleness. I will keep my eye fixed on its positive aspects.