From: utzoo!decvax!ucbvax!sf-lovers Newsgroups: fa.sf-lovers Title: SF-LOVERS Digest V6 #117 Article-I.D.: ucbvax.518 Posted: Sun Dec 26 07:04:44 1982 Received: Mon Dec 27 05:52:58 1982 >From SFL@SRI-CSL Sun Dec 26 06:59:30 1982 Reply-To: SF-LOVERS at SRI-CSL To: SF-LOVERS@SRI-CSL SF-LOVERS Digest Sunday, 26 Dec 1982 Volume 6 : Issue 117 Today's Topics: Misc - MIT archives, review of SFL Stories - Gauger's The Vacuum-Packed Picnic, Heinlein's All You Zombies T.V. - Lost in Space, Invaders, Star Trek Movies - SW/TESB/ROTJ Humor - HHGttN #3 ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Date: 15 Dec 1982 0511-EST From: TYG at MIT-OZ at MIT-MC Subject: New Archives Coming soon! To a branch of the MIT SF Society (MITSFS) near me! The hardcopy of the SF-L archives! Yep, i'm assembling a formatted version of the archives to be left in the special reserve section of the MITSFS. Based on my copious spare time :-) i'm projecting that volumes 5 and 6 (Jan through Nov 1982) will be available by this Monday the 20th, with more to follow assuming the ARPAnet doesn't self-destruct on Jan. 1. If anyone is interested in FTPing scribe formatted files of the archives, send mail to me and i'll let you know when they are complete. Finally, pseudo-simultaneous with the hardcopying, i'm trying to create edited versions of the archives, deleting temporal based info (HHGttG is on at 7pm Tuesday in Nome, Alaska), near identical submissions, and ordering by subject then date, as opposed to the archive date then subject. Just imagine; all the Pac-Man and Raiders puns in one file! I'll notify the net when these are finished. tom galloway TYG@MIT-MC TYG.MIT-OZ@MIT-MC decvax!genradbo!mitccc!tyg ------------------------------ Date: 22 Dec 1982 15:36:15 CST (Wednesday) From: Mike Meyer Subject: Review of SFL First, I would like to thank our moderator for putting the SW messages [nearly] at the end of the list. This makes it easy to interrupt out of them. Second, I'd like to second (third? nthed?) the notion of creating a separate list for SW/* - or possibly a more general movie list, to which all those [*** censored by net, but included three lines of imaginative exploration of interbeing relationships & family trees ***] AP/UPI bulletins can go. (I will resist the temptation to suggest a name for that list...) I mean, none of the SW/movie reviews schlock rightly belongs in a discussion of Speculative Fiction! With asbestos ready, From: Pettit at PARC-MAXC I can recall a story about a couple "walking" a bubble-tent back to a moon base after a picnic in the nude, and getting a bad sunburn in the process. I don't remember the name or author. This was ``The Vacuum-Packed Picnic'' by Rick Gauger, published in the September '79 ``OMNI'' (page 94). ------------------------------ Date: 24 December 1982 08:37-EST (Friday) From: Matthew J Lecin Subject: sex change (SF-LOVERS Digest V6 #114) (GMeredith.ES at Subject: PARC-MAXC) Reply-to: Lecin@Rutgers I think it is obvious you are talking about "All You Zombies" by Robert Heinlein. This short story can be found in a collection of stories called "The Unpleasant Profession of Jonathan Hoag", which I believe is also known as "6 X H"... {Mijjil} ------------------------------ Date: 22 December 1982 01:07-EST From: Greg Skinner Subject: SF-LOVERS Digest V6 #105 Does anyone out there possess, or know of, a Lost in Space trivia book? In addition, does anyone out there have a listing of all the Lost in Space episodes? ------------------------------ Date: Friday, 24 December 1982 15:31-EST From: RP at SCRC-TENEX Subject: "Invaders" TV series query I always enjoyed this series and thought the suspense and interest was maintained despite the predictable plots. However, I believe that David Vincent does "convince a disbelieving world that the nightmare has already begun". I can remember several episodes where others learn the 'truth' and my impression is that David is successful. Can anyone back me up? ------------------------------ Date: 14 Dec 1982 19:51-PST From: txr%usc-cse@USC-ECL Subject: Re: Plot "defect" in City on the Edge of Forever Reply-to: txr@USC-ECL The problem of the tricorder recordings is easily solved with only a little imagination. It's true that when McCoy jumps through the display stops, but does it stop immediately? An extra small fraction of a second could easily account for the extra year or two of history recorded. As far as that goes, there is no guarantee that the history display is strictly linear -- it might track some events for a while and then "back up" to another major thread in the fabric of history. A similar idea explains how they got the alternate histories. The guardian displays not only what the past was but what it might have been. Only one recording need have been made to have *both* alternative pasts in it, one with McCoy and one without. (After all, didn't both "already happen"?) When making the first tricorder recording, and before McCoy jumped, there are already the images of both histories within the guardian, even though only one of them "happened." Didn't the guardian say early on in the episode something like "what was, what will be, what might have been"? Tim ------------------------------ Date: 24-Dec-82 10:00-PST From: ZELLICH at OFFICE-3 Subject: Re: Henry Miller's "Kirk, etc" And, of course, you know that when trying to figure out what "T. J." stands for, the fen immediately came up with "Tiberius James", right? -Rich ------------------------------ Date: 25 December 1982 1717-EST From: Jim Anderson at CMU-CS-A Subject: Knit Picking and Weapons Title this "Annoyed at knit picking." Anyone who knows ANYTHING about military equipment, especially ships or planes , should know that it is extremely common to retrofit such equipment with the latest equipment as it becomes available. The Enterprise is supposed to be overhauled on a regular basis, allowing installation of newer equipment, as wellas permitting Star Fleet to correct any design errors discover since the last overhaul. Also I agree with -ben- and Vaf on the subject of light sabers, it is probably the lack of range and the long training time needed to be proficient with a light saber that keep it from being a more popular weapon. It is similarto the longbow being outmoded by the crossbow because the crossbow was easier tolearn. The defensive abilities of the light saber are probably almost totally useless to some one who has not had extreme amounts of training in the mystical/martial arts, such as the Force. On the armor worn by Storm Troopers I would like to point out that the observation of it being useless is quite wrong. If you watch closely enough you can see that only blast which hit at an oblique angle penetrate the armor, with blasts that hit curved sections being more oftendeflected then blasts which hit flatter areas such as the chest or back. This type of armor is probably made of composite materials, like the armor used on many tanks today. It is probably a lot more efficient, given the superior tech level of the S.W. galaxy. The armor probably has a lot of extra features such as atmosphere control and supply(notice the similarity of the helmet to a modern gas mask),blast and radiation protection,various sensory improvement and extension devices, as well as a radio and other assorted goodies. Also keep in mind that these are "Storm Troopers", the Empires equivelent of the S.S., their mentality would tend toward armor, even if only for the scare value it has. Jim P.s. The light saber is also shown being used to parry blaster shots in the original Star Wars in the scene on the Milenium Falcon where Luke is being instructed in the defensive prospects of the extension of sensory capabilities provided by employing The Force. ------------------------------ Date: 20 Dec 82 20:02:17 EST (Mon) From: Fred Blonder Subject: Re: THE OTHER From: harpo!ihnp4!ixn5c!inuxc!inuxa!claus at Ucb-C70 Have all nine parts of the Star Wars series already been outlined by George Lucas, or is he just making this up as he goes along? Dave Claus BTL/ABI Indy ------------------------------ As I understand it: all nine movies exist as at least a one-page draft which no-one other than Lucas is likely to see unless something nasty happens which would require someone else to take over. ------------------------------ Date: 19 December 1982 02:22-EST (Sunday) From: Matthew J Lecin Subject: HGttG Reply-to: Lecin@Rutgers Just a small trivia point: in the last episode (7) of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (which just aired this week in the NYC area) we meet up with the Golgafrinchans (sp?)... Did anyone besides me recognize their Captain to be the same actor (name escapes me at the moment) who played Mr. Deltoid in "A Clockwork Orange"? {Mijjil} ------------------------------ Date: 26 Dec 1982 0630-PST From: SFL at SRI-CSL Subject: hh 3 ***** sri-unix:net.jokes / grkermit!markm / 12:54 pm Dec 9, 1982 Hitch Hikers Guide To The Net Episode 3 - The Singularans (Arnold Lint and the crew of the Infinity are trying to decide what to do now that they are being faced by the deadly Singularans.) Xaphod: Oh wow, just when we got past the Flamers, we have to run into the 'Singles'. The Illogical drive won't work this time. Rod: No, and neither will evasive actions. They all talk that way! Gillian: What will we do then? Arnold Lint: I'll tell you . . . we're all going to die. Xaphod: Shut your cake-hole! Martin: I tried to tell you this trip would be a real downer, but would you listen? Rod: Quiet! Xaphod: I guess we should see what they want. (Xaphod switches on the two way video telecommunicator and RadaRange. The face of the Singularan captain appears on the screen. He is a normal human wearing a T-shirt which says: "Have you ever really listened to Manilow?" He is also sporting glow in the dark pants and 10 pounds of silver and gold chains arount his neck.) Singularan: Hey, like I'm Dirk Thawtphull. We were cruising by and saw your node. Interested in some meaningful relationships, free from the moral depravity that otherwise infects the net. Xaphod: Well, I kind of like depravity. Rod: Yah, me too. Dirk: Wow, you'd love our S & M encounter group then, fershure! Arnold Lint: Your what? Dirk: S & M encounter group. We get together twice a week and exchange recipes and beatings. Arnold Lint: How could a group like that command such a strong node? Xaphod: Well, the sudden popularity of Jogging induced widespread adoption of the principles of Single-ism. The subsequent rise of the sport of 'Joggering' reduced the numbers of Singularans to normal size. It appears that they may be making a come back though. [The "Hitch Hikers Guide to the Net" defines 'Joggering' as a sport originated in Australia to combat the sudden drop in productivity caused by having everybody jogging. Australian champion Bruce Karnage describes the sport: "Well, there is a different way of catching both male and female joggers. If it's a male, you flush him out into the open with cigarette smoke, then chase him down in your 4 x 4 Land Rover. When he's tired, bump him with the fender to stun him momentarily. Then get out and with your driver pick him up by all fours and run him head-first into the side of the truck. If it's a female, bait a likely spot with designer jogging wear and then wait for a flock to arrive. When one becomes interested, sneak up behind her, very quietly. Then when you are about two feet away, and you can see the sun dancing on her richly tanned flesh carressing her well toned figure into a visual symphony of delight, split her skull with a handy two-by-four. It's a lovely sport!" The sport later became known as 'Walkmaning'.] Rod: We were on our way to Netrothea to pick up some ... uh ... fuel, yah that's it. Dirk: Well, we've got plenty of fuel, come on over and we'll let you have it. Xaphod: No, it's OK. Dirk: I insist! (The Singularan ship lets out a pink and purple polka-dot ray that engulfs the Infinity. Arnold Lint and company find themselves in a room on the Singularan ship. It is decorated right out off the floor of a K-Mart. K-Tel's "Feelings" album is playing "You light up my existence" in the background, on the ceiling is a gigantic mirror, and in one corner is a gigantic mood-bean-bag chair.) Gillian: How awful! Martin: Actually, I kind of like it, in a depressing sort of way. Rod: Quiet. Arnold Lint: Where are we. Dirk: You're aboard the Singularan vessel "Sincerity". You will remain here until you learn to develop meaningful relationships over the Net. Meaningful relationships based on honesty, truth, and having nothing to do with physical appearance. Relationships which will grow as you and your partner, or partners, share, or don't share, things you have, or don't have, in common. You will learn how to have every other sentence include the words 'special' or 'meaningful relationship'. Xaphod: If he says "meaningful relationship" once more I'll have to pray to the porcellan buddha. Rod: Sickening, isn't it. Dirk: Right, enough of this. Wait here and we'll start programming you for meaningful relationships. (Xaphod bends over a nearby table and vomits, the 12" CRT on his shoulder starts scrolling "Uuuggghhh") Gillian: What did you mean about "programming" us? Dirk: We'll have to make you compatible with the environment and take away all your inhibitions when discussing your personal life on the Net. You'll be subjected to countless sessions watching repeats of "The Dating Game", "The Newlywed Game", and "Celebrity Wife Swapping". And that's only Stage 1! [The "Hitch Hikers Guide to the Net" points out that the three old earth TV shows just mentioned were actually the basis for a huge inter-conglomerate stock monopolizing sceme started by The Phone Company. The questions asked on these shows were actually coded messages issued by The Phone Company to the conglomerates it was working with. These messages told the associated conglomerates about which stocks to buy based on information gained by The Phone Company by listening in on the phones of importanat companies. The client corporations paid The Phone Company 1 million dollars for each such message. The seemingly idiotic contestants were, more often than not, government agents trying to break The Phone Company's code. Chuck Barris, the originator of the shows, was later found to be a financial genius, rivaled only by Howard Hughes.] Rod: We gotta get put of here! Xaphod: Yah. Rod: You know what really gets Singularans put off? Rudeness and crudeness! Arnold Lint: What? Rod: Rudeness, if we act real crude and rude, they'll beg us to leave! Xaphod: Great, let's try it! (Dirk returns with three gorgeous women and one well built female model andriod.) Rod: (To the first girl) Wow, look at that pair! Xaphod: (To the second girl) That's a lovely grab! Rod: (To the third girl) OK love, drop 'em! Martin: (To the female android) I wave my private parts toward approximate vector coordinates. Gillian: (To Dirk) Say Dirk, if you get some Saran-Wrap and chicken wire, I'll get the honey and the plunger. Dirk: Get out of here you disgusting filthly maladjusted perverts! (The three women and one andriod exit with great haste. The crew of the Infinity is beamed back to their node.) Dirk: Good riddens. Put on the flip side of "Feelings" and pass the cheese dip. It's their loss, for only we know what true meaningful relationships are. Only we know the feeling of wholeness that comes from showing, or not showing, what one feels, or doesn't feel, with someone special we care about. We aren't hung up on physical things, we are spiritualists. At least, that's what we tell everyone else. Xaphod: Right, now on to Netrothea, nothing can stop us now. ******************** End Of Part 3 ******************** Will the crew of the Infinity reach Netrothea, or will Nothing stop them? For the answers to this, and other useless questions . . . Tune in next time . . . same Net-time . . . same Net-channel. ------------------------------ End of SF-LOVERS Digest ***********************