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From: markm@grkermit.UUCP (Mark S. Miller)
Newsgroups: net.flame
Subject: Re: Driving in Boston
Message-ID: <544@grkermit.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 8-Aug-83 12:08:59 EDT
Article-I.D.: grkermit.544
Posted: Mon Aug  8 12:08:59 1983
Date-Received: Mon, 8-Aug-83 20:49:35 EDT
References: houxt.332 <28@orca.UUCP>
Organization: GenRad Inc., Concord, MA
Lines: 66

As wild as driving in Boston proper is, the suburbs around ole'
Bean-Town are equally exciting. For example:

*	The car that came off the fastest road into a rotary has the right
of way for as long as other cars saw him come off that road (about 180
degrees).

*	No-passing zones do NOT apply to anything about cars, rather they
prohibit one from relieving oneself when a car is trying to pass in the
opposite lane and is heading straight for you at 60mph.

*	Stop signs are used only when convenient.

*	NEVER use turn indicators, it gives everyone else an unfair
advantage. For that matter, disconnecting brake lights really makes it
tough for those idiots around you to second-guess (this really helps
out in shopping centers  when parking space is tough to come by).

*	Try not to drive between 3 and 4 in the afternoon, this is when all
the old-timers hop into their Caddy's and go for a drive.

*	Beware of people who drive with hats on. (Actually, this applies
everywhere)

*	There are two basic ways to drive in the snow, too slow and too
fast. Each method is based on the simple fact that snow makes it hard
to stop. If you drive too slow, the trouble may move before you hit it,
and if you drive too fast you get out of the snow quicker.

*	The old "Age before beauty" rule DEFINATELY applies, most of the
really aggressive drivers out here drive old Plymouth Furies and Dodge
Darts.

*	All auto repairs are done no more that one month before inspection
time.

*	Beware of housewives between the hours of 10 and 2, they pull out
of shopping centers and elementary schools at 90mph, but then
immediately settle into their more comforatable 15mph (so as not to jar
the brats or groceries).

*	If you have to make a left across traffic at a light, coasting out
into traffic 3 seconds before the light turns tells oncoming traffic
that you have them beat.

*	U-turns are never illegal, but it's more fun if you miss and make
it a Y-turn so as to tie up as much traffic as possible.

*	Never, never, never hit pedestrians (when anyone is looking).

*	At 4-way stop intersections, the right of way always goes to the
car that doesn't stop.

*	Truckers ALWAYS have the right of way. Most of these guys aren't
from New England and have to fall back on whiskey and tonnage to get
them through our streets - killing a few Yankees will not bother them
in the least (unless they get caught).

	Those are only a few of the oddities of the area. One must
remember, however, that we have that pioneer spirit out here in the
'burbs. One must be aggressive to survive in the 128 belt, and that
means hardy driving habits. If you can't take it - get out. As the
saying goes: "He who hesitates is scrap metal".

				Mark Miller
				GenRad, Concord MA