Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10 5/26/83; site iheds.UUCP
Path: utzoo!linus!decvax!harpo!gummo!whuxlb!pyuxll!eisx!npoiv!npois!hogpc!houxm!hocda!spanky!burl!sb1!ll1!otuxa!we13!ihnp4!iheds!kmw
From: kmw@iheds.UUCP
Newsgroups: net.women
Subject: Re:Gender-Language on the net
Message-ID: <254@iheds.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 10-Aug-83 12:05:07 EDT
Article-I.D.: iheds.254
Posted: Wed Aug 10 12:05:07 1983
Date-Received: Thu, 11-Aug-83 20:20:50 EDT
References: <182@teltone.UUCP>
Organization: BTL Naperville, Il.
Lines: 34

I've noticed a disturbing assumption in some of the postings relating to
sexist language.
 
Implicit in some of the articles is that either:
 
	Women who are disturbed by sexist language, attitudes, etc.
	can point this out and try to get them changed.
 
or:
 
	Women can overcome sexist language, etc. by working hard and
	proving competence.
 
 
Why does the former preclude the latter?  Of course I'm not going to let
the fact that the letter was addressed to "Mr. Kathleen Wilber" stop me
from reading it!  Of course I'm not going to stop listening to the speaker
because he called us "men"!  And so on. 
 
But why shouldn't I also write a note to the company that mailed the letter
and ask them to use names as given on their mailing list, not automatically
prepending "Mr."?  Or point out to the speaker that "men" is no longer
acurate?  I don't scream, throw tomatoes, or walk out; I assume I'm giving
them information that had genuinely not occurred to them.  (By this I mean
either that it really was never pointed out before ("I didn't know it
bothered you."), or they didn't know it bothered a lot of women ("I knew it
bothered one woman who spoke to me, but I thought it was just her.").
  
It does bother many women to be referred to as men, and the women who are
not bothered would also not be bothered by being referred to as "employees,"
"attendees," "engineers," or whatever the group is.  The change seems 
reasonable to me - but it won't happen unless we ask.
	
	Kathy Wilber  (iheds!kmw or mvuxt!kw)