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From: stevesu@bronze.UUCP (Steve Summit)
Newsgroups: net.flame
Subject: Bikes and Cars
Message-ID: <787@bronze.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 4-Oct-83 01:21:38 EDT
Article-I.D.: bronze.787
Posted: Tue Oct  4 01:21:38 1983
Date-Received: Wed, 28-Sep-83 20:56:56 EDT
Lines: 72

I can't resist any longer.  I have to post this.

I'm a bike rider, and I love sharing the road with cars.  I know
I have all the rights of a car, and I demand them.  I LOVE riding
like a car!  I'm not talking about deserted country roads,
either.  I ride in the city.  What city?  Boston, Massachusetts! 
Yes, the same city whose atrocious driving habits you read about
in net.jokes.  It's as bad/good as they say.  Driving in Boston
is a trip.  Riding a bike is a trip and a half.  It's pretty
flat, so you can ride fast, and the (car) traffic is slow, so
you're on equal footing when it comes to speed.  Bikes kick cars
when it comes to maneuverability and 0-10mph acceleration, so you
can really have some fun.  (Granted, they have you beat hands
down in the mass category, so don't let them run into you.)
Everyone in Boston admits that you can get someplace faster on a
bike (or walking, for that matter) than in a car.  For one thing,
you don't have to be quite so scrupulously observant of all the
absurd one-way streets.

One of my all-time favorite things to do is ride my ten speed at
full speed down Beacon Street.  (For those who haven't
experienced Boston, Beacon Street is one of the only streets in
the country where you have to back in to double park.)  The cars
are running the whole gamut of Boston tricks: right turns from
the left lane and vice versa, mid-block U turns, and everything. 
You really have to be on your toes.  You can't pay too much
attention to the cars, though, or one of the VW-eating potholes
will swallow you up...  The road is still lousy enough that your
eyes are bouncing out of their sockets and you can hardly focus. 
Got to, though -- every car is out to get you and you have to be
constantly aware of everything every car in front of you could
possibly do to screw you up.  (Who cares what's behind you, since
you're going as fast as or faster than they are.)  Have good
brakes, because everything happens fast at 20mph on streets that
were laid out by wandering cars.  That won't solve everything,
because in spite of all your foresight some inspiredly deranged
driver is going to cut you off and you don't want to go flying
over the handlebars.  I've lost count of the number of times I
brought myself to a stop with my hand against the roof of the car
that was turning right in front of me, banging on it all the way.
(Boy, does that freak the driver out!)

Hunter S. Thompson says adrenaline is the most potent drug there
is.  He is so right.  It takes my heart two hours to slow down
after a trip down Beacon Street.

For sheer bursts of insanity, though, nothing beats riding on
rotaries.  (Other cities call these traffic circles, and put them
in the middle of low-speed residential districts, and post lots
of informative warning signs.  Rotaries in Boston are at the
intersection of expressways, and you don't slow down around
them.)  I've never seen the look on the face of a driver I cut
off on a rotary, but I'm gloating.  (One of the cardinal rules of
driving in Boston, which applies to all vehicles in a cut-off
situation, is that you NEVER look at the guy you're cutting off,
because that would be acknowledging that you knew he was there
and that he deserved the right of way.)

Sure, I'm suicidal.  I never wear a helmet, either, 'cause
they're for wimps.  My head is solid bone, anyway.  I once took
out the window of a taxicab with my head and walked away.  (You
shoulda seen the look on that guy's face.  I was barreling along
at about 30, looking over my shoulder at the car I was cutting
off, and I ran into him head-on.)

Now, I'm not recommending this riding style, mind you.  But if
you want to have some real fun, living dangerously, point your
two wheels in the direction of the nearest congested metropolitan
area, and show those lazy drivers that two are better than four.

                                         Steve Summit
                                         tektronix!tekmdp!stevesu