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Path: utzoo!linus!security!genrad!decvax!sultan!dag
From: dag@sultan.UUCP (Dan Glasser -- PRO 350 Graphics - ML)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Fatal Error Messages:
Message-ID: <195@sultan.UUCP>
Date: Sat, 15-Oct-83 01:55:28 EDT
Article-I.D.: sultan.195
Posted: Sat Oct 15 01:55:28 1983
Date-Received: Tue, 18-Oct-83 01:07:55 EDT
Organization: DEC  Spit Brook Rd., Nashua, NH
Lines: 37

I once worked on an experimental system that had a power controller that
allowed the system time to shut down cleanly in the case of a power
failure.  When the power would go down, the system would trap to a
routine that would "unload" the disks and then print the following
message on all terminal lines (which any terminal that was still up
would print...)

	Power Zapped; Program Crapped; Data Scrapped; User Trapped!

The "panic" message that would be sent to the terminals in case of a
microcode failure was:

	System Crashed, Program Smashed, Data Trashed, Image Stashed!

I don't know who developed the OS that we were using, but the other
less fatal error messages were nearly as useful.  I can not remember
any off hand, but they were to the effect of:

	Errors happen, y'know?  Don't get too uptight. LOC n mmm
	Don't blame me!  I didn't write it!  ERR n LOC n mmm
	Idiot!  HALT
	Illegal character at terminal: Go away!
	ZAP!  You're DEAD!	ERR x LOC n mmm
	Can't find return frame.  Do you have it?  LOC n mmm
	Illegal memory -- you will be reprogrammed!
	Keep your hands off my core!
	Can't load this trash!
	FIX IT: LOC n mmm

This machine was rather strange as it was manufactured by a "major"
computer company in a very small quantity and had a loadable
control store that was non-volitile core.  The machine was SLOW!

				Happy to be on the net again!

					...!decvax!sultan!dag
					Daniel A. Glasser