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From: lute@abnjh.UUCP (J. Collymore)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: If you love something, let it go...
Message-ID: <294@abnjh.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 17-Nov-83 15:52:22 EST
Article-I.D.: abnjh.294
Posted: Thu Nov 17 15:52:22 1983
Date-Received: Sat, 19-Nov-83 01:24:55 EST
Lines: 37



That saying first became popular (from posters) when I was an undergrad back in
the early 70's.  I've been reading a lot of the discussions here, and most of
the writers tend to not believe in the practicality of that slogan.  These
feelings are backed by some pretty logical arguments.  And until recently, I
held some similar views.  I also began to look back and notice something
about my own social life.  Whenever I broke off a relationship to let 
my girlfriend "fly free," I would always make the conditions of the break-up
unconditional (i.e.  we can remain friends, but nothing more emotional than
light friendship will be allowed.)  This was to ensure that I would suffer
no further disappointments or hurt.

Well, I found out (sometimes months or years later) that some of the women/girls
I had broken up with, discovered they did want me more than some other partner.
They only became sure of that once they could check for themselves that the
grass really wasn't greener on the other side.  But because of my rigid logic,
honor, bitterness (which this type of thing usually causes), etc. I had made
it clear that there was no room for reconciliation.  I had made a trade-off
for myself.  That was, to be alone, rather than chance that this might happen
again with that person

Except in cases where the woman had put me through hell from the
begininng, I now really regret not having given her (us) a second
chance.  I feel now that almost everyone's relationship deserves two tries
(except those relationships where deliberate emotional or physical abuse are
involved).

Now to many of you, this concept may sound illogical compared to the more
"logical" arguments already presented on this topic, which generally disagree
with my point of view.  However, as a woman told me recently:  "Jim, you're too
logical.  Love and romance are NOT that logical."


					Live and learn,

					Jim Collymore