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From: hood@uiucuxc.UUCP
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Dallas Cowboys - (nf)
Message-ID: <4870@uiucdcs.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 11-Jan-84 22:30:45 EST
Article-I.D.: uiucdcs.4870
Posted: Wed Jan 11 22:30:45 1984
Date-Received: Sun, 15-Jan-84 00:02:18 EST
Lines: 53

#N:uiucuxc:3500120:000:1847
uiucuxc!hood    Jan 11 13:16:00 1984

[Please note : Only a Texan can poke fun of TEXAS!!]

		Dallas Coyboys Official Schedule 1984

	Sept 14			Pasadena Junior High
	Sept 21			Boy Scout Troop 049
	Sept 28			Blind Academy
	Sept 30			World War I Veterans
	Oct 5			Brownie Scout Troop 041
	Oct 12			Sugarcreek High Cheerleaders
	Oct 26			St. Thomas Boys Choir
	Nov 2			Texas City Vet Clinic
	Nov 9			Korean War Amputees
	Nov 15			VA Hospital Polio Patients

		Rule Changes for this year

1)  When playing Polio Patients, Cowboy players must not disconnect iron
    lungs.
2)  When playing Brownie Scouts, Cowboy players must not steal their 
    cookies.
3)  When playing the blind Academy, Cowboy players must not hide the ball
    under their jerseys.
4)  When playing the Korean War Amputees, Cowboy players must not file any 
    complaints about an opposing player with one leg being harder to tackle.
5)  A touchdown will count as 21 points for the Dallas Cowboys.
6)  Dallas Cowboys will be allowed 27 players.
7)  Dallas Cowboys will be allowed to play with three footballs at the same
    time.
8)  Dallas Cowboys will be allowed to substitute with band members at any
    time during the game.
9)  Dallas Cowboys will be allowed 20 time outs.
10) A gain of 3 yards in 5 plays will constitute a first down for the 
    Dallas Cowboys.


As you can see, Dallas is facing a much rougher schedule this year.
So, all you Dallas fans ...(all 16 of you)... should get out there
and cheer them on to victory.......

                              _
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                              |         Efrem Kurtz
                              |
                          ____|____|     The Ice Runner
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