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From: peters@cubsvax.UUCP (Peter S. Shenkin)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Yet Another Parrot Joke
Message-ID: <153@cubsvax.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 27-Jan-84 10:43:16 EST
Article-I.D.: cubsvax.153
Posted: Fri Jan 27 10:43:16 1984
Date-Received: Sat, 28-Jan-84 02:25:48 EST
Organization: Columbia Univ Biology, New York City
Lines: 43

NOTE: to understand this joke you have to know that the Jewish high
holy days are Rosh Hashannah and Yom Kippur, and the second occurs
ten days after the first (in Sept. or Oct. on the Western calendar).

___________________________________________________________________

An elderly Jewish widower decides to get a pet, because he is feeling
lonely.  At the pet shop, he is taken with a magnificent parrot, which
he purchases, and brings home.  Since the death of his wife he has 
taken a more active role in his local congregation.  In fact, it has 
become very important for him to display his erudition and fervor in prayer.  
It is September, and he spends an hour or so each day practicing the 
Rosh Hashannah prayers, so that he will be able to recite them flawlessly 
when the time comes.

Well, it turns out that this parrot begins reciting the prayers with him,
and not only learning them well -- in fact, the parrot seems to have
some cognitive ability, is learning to read Hebrew, and is altogether 
unusual.

So, as the high holy days approach, the widower tells the other members
of the congregation about his marvelous parrot, obviously a miraculous 
gift from God.  They roll their eyes and humor him, but obviously don't
believe a word.  One member challenges the widower to a bet that his 
parrot can't get through the Rosh Hashannah service, and the widower 
takes this and many other bets, and proclaims that, on Rosh Hashannah, 
he will bring the parrot in to synagogue, and the parrot will lead the service!

Well, you guessed it:  on the fateful day, with all eyes upon it, all
the parrot does is tilt his head and squalk, "Polly wanna cracker."
The widower is beside himself, points out the place in the prayerbook,
etc., but to no avail.  The rest of the congregation is laughing and
pointing and shaking their heads.

At the end of the service the man brings the parrot home and says, "How
could you do this to me?  Not only did I lose most of my savings, but
you also made me the laughing stock of the congregation."

The parrot replies, "Not to worry!  Are we gonna make a killing on
Yom Kippur!"

{philabs,cmcl2!rocky2}!cubsvax!peters
(Peter S Shenkin; Dept of Biol Sci; Columbia Univ; NY, NY 10027; 212-280-5517)