Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP
Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site mit-eddie.UUCP
Path: utzoo!linus!security!genrad!mit-eddie!rh
From: rh@mit-eddie.UUCP (Randy Haskins)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: The Other Side of the Fence
Message-ID: <1135@mit-eddie.UUCP>
Date: Sun, 8-Jan-84 02:39:07 EST
Article-I.D.: mit-eddi.1135
Posted: Sun Jan  8 02:39:07 1984
Date-Received: Sun, 8-Jan-84 07:33:36 EST
References: <229@wu1.UUCP> <1183@watcgl.UUCP>
Organization: MIT, Cambridge, MA
Lines: 29

Re Fragile Ego's..

I suppose the flying analogy is a good one.  Of course, there is 
a slight difference.  If I blow it flying a plane, chances are
I'll die.  If I blow it asking a woman (oops, I mean FEMALE)
out for a date, I will almost assuredly not die.  Now it is
well known, however, that most people are more afraid of
looking stupid than dying.  This is a sad aspect of our society,
but it occurs because people don't have to worry about dying
as much as they do about looking stupid (you can only die once).
I became a good public speaker early on (about 10 years ago)
because I realized that there was no danger.  It took me
a while longer to realize that there is no danger with
asking females out, but eventually I realized.  I suppose that's
the whole point:  You've got nothing to lose, you only have
things to gain.  You might as well go ahead and ask the female out.
If she says no, then it's her loss, right?  (Admittedly, you should
avoid getting into this way of thinking to an extent to where
you become bitter about it.  Also, admittedly, it helps if all
of the females you ask out aren't losing.)  I found that
the way to compensate for and overcome insecurities is to 
attempt to become egotistical.  I've settled out of that,
now that I've worked out being insecure and inconfident (is
this a word?  someone should probably look it up if we are
going to use it).  Just do whatever works, just remember,
they aren't any better than you are.

-- 
Randwulf  (Randy Haskins);  Path= genrad!mit-eddie!rh