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Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!seismo!hao!woods
From: woods@hao.UUCP (Greg Woods)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: Dating Siblings of Friends
Message-ID: <784@hao.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 9-Jan-84 19:38:06 EST
Article-I.D.: hao.784
Posted: Mon Jan  9 19:38:06 1984
Date-Received: Wed, 11-Jan-84 03:09:03 EST
References: <1140@mit-eddie.UUCP>
Organization: High Altitude Obs./NCAR, Boulder CO
Lines: 36


  Better watch out for this one. If the (romantic) relationship involved
does not work out, it can put a tremendous strain on the other two relationships
involved. 
  I won't bore everyone with the details, but one of my best friends started
dating my sister. When they broke up (under not the most friendly circumstances)
I was left in a very embarassing position, with both sides unconsiously (I 
believe) trying to influence me to take their "side". This put an incredible
strain on my friendship with the guy, and on my relationship with my sister
as well. The sibling relationship had seen much worse things over a 25+-year
lifetime, so it survived intact, but my relationship with the guy involved,
who had been one of my best friends for several years, was totally destroyed.
I don't even like the guy any more.  It didn't help that I had personal reasons
for disapproving of their relationship in the first place, even though I 
deliberately avoided acting on those feelings (it really wasn't any of my 
business). 

  On the other hand, what do you suppose would happen if I deliberately avoided
all the MOTOS's that, at one point or another, I have been advised to avoid
in net.singles? If memory serves, this includes friends of ex's, co-workers,
roommates and neighbors, already-attached's, and people from the net.
Who the hell else is there???? :-)

  The way I look at it is, anything with potential complications among people
you *already* have close, or in some way important, relationships with (such as
this case in point: a friend's sister), it should be just one negative check
mark. If there are enough likeable and/or desireable things about this guy's
sister, and he has no negative feelings about it (or if you don't care if he
does), then go for it! Just bear in mind that it could cause later complications
between you and your friend, or between your friend and his sister, even if
it *does* work out. Good luck.

			GREG
-- 
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       		        !hao!woods