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From: rt1tt@ihps3.UUCP (janis bell)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Accident Reports
Message-ID: <447@ihps3.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 27-Mar-84 10:18:46 EST
Article-I.D.: ihps3.447
Posted: Tue Mar 27 10:18:46 1984
Date-Received: Wed, 28-Mar-84 01:20:11 EST
Organization: AT&T Bell Labs, Naperville, IL
Lines: 47

This is list of official accident reports filed for insurance claims:

Coming home, Idrove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't 
have.

The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.

I thought my window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head 
through it.

I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.

A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.

The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I
hit him.

I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and 
headed over the embankment.

The telephone pole was approaching, I was attempting to swerve out of its
way when it struck the front end.

In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had
an accident.

To avoid hitting the bumper on the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.

My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.

An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.

I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I had
a fractured skull.

I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road
when I struck him.

The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him

I saw a slow-moving, sad-faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my
car.

I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch
by some stray cows.