Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 Fluke 1/4/84; site fluke.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!floyd!harpo!decvax!ucbvax!ucbcad!tektronix!uw-beaver!ssc-vax!fluke!inc From: inc@fluke.UUCP (Gary Benson) Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: Headache Cure Message-ID: <235@tpvax.fluke.UUCP> Date: Wed, 4-Apr-84 14:30:51 EST Article-I.D.: tpvax.235 Posted: Wed Apr 4 14:30:51 1984 Date-Received: Sat, 7-Apr-84 05:38:32 EST Organization: John Fluke Mfg. Co., Everett, WA Lines: 62 + + **** NOTE CAUTION DANGER WARNING **** This is an adult joke, and may be offensive to headache sufferers, physicians, hospital patients, haberdashers and castrati. Read at your own risk. Please press the your 'q' key if you might find this fable offensive and might flame about it. Thank you, Your unix system. And now, on with the joke: Seems this fellow was suffering from terrific headaches, and went to his doctor about it. The physician made a number of tests, and informed the man that the only thing for his headaches was castration. Horrified, the man decided to continue suffering a while. Finally the headaches became so intense that he agreed, was admitted to the hospital, and the operation was performed. On rounds the next day, the doctor asked how the guy was feeling. "I'm really depressed, Doc," was the reply. "To think I'll never have a sex life again makes me just as gloomy as I can be." The doctor says, "Well, that's not unusual. In cases like this, I advise my patients to take their minds off things by going out and purchasing an entire new wardrobe." When he's released from the hospital, the guy goes out shopping. He enters a men's clothing store, and says he wants an entire new set of clothes. The salesman looks him over, and says, "Well, let's start with shirts. You take a 16 neck, 34 sleeve." The guy can't believe it. "How can you tell?" The salesman answers, "Well, I've been in this business nearly 30 years, and I can tell a man's size to within half an inch on every piece of clothing." The man is amazed to see this claim borne out: "Let's see, slacks: you're a 36 waist, 34 inseam"; jacket: 42 long." And so on and on. When he has made all his purchases, the man says, "Well I may as well get new underclothes while I'm here." The salesman looks at him, and says, "You should wear a 38 in shorts." "No, that's wrong," the man says. "I have always worn a 36." THe salesman insists, and points out his accuracy up til then. The man argues, saying that may be true, but that he has always worn a 36 shorts. Finally in exasperation, the salesman says, "Listen, I tell you, you *must* wear a 38. Otherwise, you'll get these *terrific* headaches." From the ever smiling, .). ever happy fingers of: V Gary Benson + + John Fluke Mfg. Co. ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDUM !fluke!inc + + -- From the ever smiling, .). ever happy fingers of: V Gary Benson + + John Fluke Mfg. Co. ILLEGITIMI NON CARBORUNDUM !fluke!inc + +