Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site cepu.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!akgua!mcnc!decvax!ittvax!dcdwest!sdcsvax!bmcg!cepu!scw From: scw@cepu.UUCP Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: SPR response (off to software/hardware vendors) Message-ID: <226@cepu.UUCP> Date: Tue, 17-Apr-84 16:43:01 EST Article-I.D.: cepu.226 Posted: Tue Apr 17 16:43:01 1984 Date-Received: Wed, 18-Apr-84 19:15:28 EST Organization: VA Wadsworth Med. Center, LA CA Lines: 80 This cropped up on my desk a while ago, it's dated 9/9/82 but I recall recieving SPR responses much like it in 1975. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Notice: This Software information may contain code which has not been fully tested. Use this information with discretion and care. Subject: PSR support on XXX and XXXXXX <-name changed to protect the vendor> Please stop submitting PSR's. This is our system, we designed it, we built it, and we use it more that you do. If there are some features you think might be missing, if the system isn't as effective as you think it should be, TOUGH! Give it back, we don't need you. See figure 1. Forget about your silly problem, let's take a look at some of the features of the operating system. 1) Options. We've got lots of them. So many in fact that you would need two strong people to carry the documentaion around. So many that it'll be a cold day in hell before half of them are used. So many that you probably wouldn't get them to work right anyway. However, the number of options isn't all that important, because we picked some interesting values for the options and called them ... 2) Defaults. We put a lot of thought into our defaults. We like them. If we didn't, we would have made something else the default. So keep your cotton-picking hands off our defaults. Don't touch. Consider them mandatory. "Mandatory Defaults" has a nice ring to it. If you change them and the system crashes, tough. See figure 1. 3)Language Processors. They work just fine. They take in source, and often produce object files for you efforts. You can even make operating system calls from them. For any that you can't, use the assembler like we do. You don't like the code? Too bad! We spoke to the language processor developers about this, and they think a lot like we do. They said "See figure 1." 4)Debuggers. We've got debuggers, one we support and one we use. You shouldn't make mistakes anyhow, it is a waste of time, and we don't want to hear anything about debuggers, we're not interested. See figure 1. 5)Error logging. Ignore it, why give yourself an ulcer? You don't want to give us the machine to get it fixed, and we probably can't do it anyway. Oh, and if the machine breaks between 1700 and 1800 or 0930 an 1030 or 1130 and 1330 or 1430 and 1530, don't waste you time calling us, we're out. See figure 1. 6)Command Language. We designed it ourselves, it's perfect. We like it so much that we put our name on it, CCL-XXXXX Control Language. In fact we're so happy with it, we designed it once for each of our operating systems. We even try to keep it the same from release to release, but sometimes we blow it, we can't be perfect. See figure 1. 7)Real Time Performance. We got it. Who else could have done such a good job? So the system seems a bit sluggish with all those priority 70 tasks, no problem, just make them priority 1. Anyway Realtime isn't as important as it used to be, we changed our group's name to get rid of the word realtime, and we told all of our realtime users to see figure 1 a long time ago. In conclusion, stuff your PSR. Love our system or leave it, but don't complain. _ ( ) | | | | .-! !-. .-! ! ! !.-. ! ! ! ; <-Figure 1. \ ; \ ; ! : Names changed to protect the guilty -- Stephen C. Woods (VA Wadsworth Med Ctr./UCLA Dept. of Neurology) uucp: { {ihnp4, uiucdcs}!bradley, hao, trwrb, sdcsvax!bmcg}!cepu!scw ARPA: cepu!scw@ucla-locus location: N 34 06'37" W 118 25'43"