Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!decvax!ittvax!dcdwest!sdcsvax!sdcrdcf!hplabs!sri-unix!Hamilton.ES@XEROX.ARPA From: Hamilton.ES@XEROX.ARPA Newsgroups: net.movies Subject: Movie reviews Message-ID: <1632@sri-arpa.UUCP> Date: Thu, 5-Jul-84 21:27:14 EDT Article-I.D.: sri-arpa.1632 Posted: Thu Jul 5 21:27:14 1984 Date-Received: Sun, 8-Jul-84 00:09:51 EDT Lines: 88 From: Bruce Hamilton Monday night I saw a preview screening of THE LAST STARFIGHTER. This made-for-TV-style Star Wars ripoff manages to have some of the most boring spacefight scenes I've ever seen. AVOID THIS TURKEY! I couldn't even tell for sure when the climax was, or whether the bad guys had been defeated. The movie ends after a mere 95 minutes, with the most blatant invitation to a sequel I've ever seen. The "hero" is this jerk who lives in a trailer park, and whose major skill in life is playing video games. His girlfriend doesn't seem to be able to say anything except, "But what about Granny?" Then there's this dope called Centauri who recruits our "hero" to fight the bad guys, and manages to sound like a reject comic from the Tonight Show -- or was it Disneyland? Never in my filmgoing life have I experienced such total debasement of potential nobility into utter banality. The credits claimed a Digital Productions Cray X-MP and a dozen programmers, but as far as I could tell, all the graphics could have been done on an Apple. So I can't even call it a triumph of effects over plot. I'd rather watch a cheap, campy Roger Corman ripoff any day, compared to this sort of cutesy multi-megabuck major studio fluff. And I'm sick and tired of semi-cute, bipedal aliens that look just like humans except for the nose of an elephant or the skin of a lizard or something equally identifiably ridiculous. Let's see some ALIEN aliens! Looking back, I don't think anyone has made a SERIOUS scifi film since 2001. This fall we get to find out whether 2010 can live up to it. I approach 2010 with high scepticism. The trailer doesn't prove much one way or the other, except that MAYBE Roy Scheider can match Gary Lockwood's astronaut cool. -------------- GHOSTBUSTERS: Most of you have probably already seen it. This is the funniest film in at least a year. Words can't describe. Don't be turned off if you only saw the lousy trailer for it. -------------- THE POPE OF GREENWICH VILLAGE: The best serious film in several months. Eric Roberts does a variation on the incredible punk he played in STAR80. Mickey Roarke again proves to be one of the most impressive young actors, short of DeNiro. Daryl Hannah (SPLASH) is attractive as Roarke's girlfriend. But I thought the most impressive performance was Kenneth MacMillan, in an unusual role for him, as an old-time locksmith who's been in the joint and is ready to break the law again to provide for his family. -------------- FINDERS KEEPERS: A very solid, consistently funny chase comedy featuring Beverly D'Angelo. -------------- GREMLINS: Not particularly funny, or scary, or violent, or...? I sat in on an interview with director Joe Dante at a screening a couple of weeks ago, and I'd like to settle a couple of issues: first of all, Dante himself made it quite clear that he is less than pleased with the film. So don't beat up on him -- he probably agrees with you. The film started with a more or less standard gory script, but then Dante and crew tried to do a lot of comic improvisation. Secondly, NOT true that Speilberg had any particular creative control. He told Dante "Go do it", then Speilberg went off and did Indiana Jones. -------------- STAR TREK III: Yawn. Better than #I, not as good as #II. Trekkies will like it. The usual insipid, explicit, TV-esque philosophizing about war 'n friendship 'n loyalty 'n all that good stuff. -------------- Anybody seen TOP SECRET? I haven't. I keep having this fear that they blew all the best gags in the trailer, the way they did on AIRPLANE. -------------- BEAT STREAT: These Big Apple graffitti artists, breakers, and rap dj's make the LA dudes in "Breakin'" look like wimps. Cousin Brucie says check it out! -------------- footnote to Angelenos: YOU TOO can see over 50 free films a year, often including interviews with producers, directors, cast, and crew, by joining the ACADEMY OF SCIENCE FICTION, FANTASY, AND HORROR FILMS. Send $25 for the rest of this year (regularly $40/ year) to the Academy at 334 W. 54th St., Los Angeles 90037. Most screenings are 10:30am weekends at either the Four Star Theater, Wilshire near La Brea, or at the Norris Theater at USC. --Bruce