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From: judy@ism780.UUCP
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: Re: THE kiss of death (insecure wome - (nf)
Message-ID: <276@ism780.UUCP>
Date: Sat, 30-Jun-84 00:10:06 EDT
Article-I.D.: ism780.276
Posted: Sat Jun 30 00:10:06 1984
Date-Received: Sun, 1-Jul-84 00:31:38 EDT
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#R:gatech:-831000:ism780:13000007:000:1882
ism780!judy    Jun 28 14:47:00 1984

Why is being a "nice" guy the kiss of death?

Unfortunately in our society we are taught to let ourselves be
trampled on all in the name of "being nice".  Why?  So people
will like you.  Everyone likes a nice person.  Shoot, why not.
Nice people will do anything you want them to.  You can treat
them like dogs and they will come back wagging their tails.  I
use the word "doormat" as a synonym for "nice" when referring to
a person.  And I suffer from doormatitis myself.

But what happens to the woman on the other side of the nice guy.
She starts feeling like a real sh*t.  The one "nice" guy I dated
made me feel like the queen bitch.  We went wherever I wanted to
to go.  We had sex when and where I wanted to.  The relationship
was anything I wanted.  And like too much candy, it made me sick.
My undisciplined self treated him like dirt because he put up
with it.  In fact, I don't think I even had the decency to break
up with him.  I just wandered off and he never demanded (nice
people never demand) even an explanation.

What I have now is a true sweetheart, but no one would accuse him
of being nice.  He is, instead, opinionated, obstinate, and great
fun.  He doesn't put up with sh*t in his life and neither do I.
We have good, healthy fights when we disagree (or sometimes when
we're just both in bad moods).  And when he does something
wonderful for me I appreciate it all the more because I know he
didn't feel obligated.

The reaction you are getting from women when you don't shave
should give you another clue.  Heterosexual women usually (at
least I do) lust after virile men.  Not only is a little stubble
virile (and sexy) but so are great pectorals, a good ass, chest
hair, etc.  Now lust does not a relationship make, but it is a
good place to start.   But virile men have more than physical
attributes.  They also have a back bone.  Nice men often don't.