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From: dsaker@iuvax.UUCP
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Beauty & Packaging
Message-ID: <1900006@iuvax.UUCP>
Date: Sun, 1-Jul-84 17:16:00 EDT
Article-I.D.: iuvax.1900006
Posted: Sun Jul  1 17:16:00 1984
Date-Received: Wed, 4-Jul-84 03:17:21 EDT
Lines: 26
Nf-ID: #N:iuvax:1900006:000:1419
Nf-From: iuvax!dsaker    Jul  1 16:16:00 1984


Let me start by saying that the contents of the package are most certainly
important.  In an intimate relationship, I need to be able to relate to
my companion/lover/SO (whatever you want to call it/he/she) on a close
personal level, and that requires the right (for me) kinds of intelligence, 
personality, values, attitudes, & so forth in the package.

However, the packaging also matters.  I need to enjoy looking at,
touching, being touched by, etcetera my lover/SO.  My sexuality (which is not
a separate box inside me, but, rather, a thread which runs throughout my
personality and my reactions to others -- especially my lover/SO) requires
that I find my lover/SO attractive.

I have been in a relationship in which the other person was wonderful as a
person, but not really attractive to me.  They were, however, so wonderful
as a person that we became lovers.  (For me, to be truly emotionally intimate
requires physical intimacy as well.)  Well, that relationship failed in the
bedroom (so to speak).  In many ways, sex with that person was good; but the 
experience of sometimes looking at them and having a negative response to
some part of their body was destructive.

I seek beauty (physical attractiveness) in a lover/SO because that beauty
is important to me in an intimate relationship.

                                    Daryel Akerlind
                                 ...ihnp4!inuxc!iuvax!dsaker