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From: afo@pucc-h (sefton)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Reply to Trish (long!)
Message-ID: <838@pucc-h>
Date: Fri, 13-Jul-84 15:45:24 EDT
Article-I.D.: pucc-h.838
Posted: Fri Jul 13 15:45:24 1984
Date-Received: Sun, 15-Jul-84 01:40:19 EDT
Organization: Purdue University Computing Center
Lines: 73

Well, Trish, you certainly sent a few flames down the line.  I am *not*
condemming you, or your position; and I am not necessarily agreeing with
the position held by anyone else in this newsgroup; however, I would like
to comment on the first part of your message.

>> Trish
   Laurie
   
>>   1. I am very happy being gay. period.
Fine, I am happy that you are happy being gay.	
>>   2. I have men friends, but I wouldn't give them the time of day on a 
>>	romantic basis.
I have plenty of female friends that I have no romantic interest in; however,
I have male friends that I have no romantic interest in, either.
>>   3. My dislike of men is not only from experience, but observation, and
>>	experiences of my straight and gay female friends.
Now, is that your dislike of those men? Or that of *all* men?  If it's the 
latter, you have contradicted yourself.  If it's the former; we all have formedopinions on certain individuals based on observation and experience.  But it's
*not* gender-dependent.
>>   4. I have always been attracted to women, but like many gay folks, I tried>>      be straight and "normal"because I was brought up to believe that a good>>      woman keeps a man happy.	Of course I think that's bullshit!!!
The way you were brought up doesn't reflect on this entire society.  Also, you
appear to be saying that you were sexually attracted to women before you
attained your views on males.  This contradicts an earlier statement.
>>   5. I got tired of playing straight and being disgusted with male dates.
I probably wouldn't be very happy pretending I was gay.  Would you consider
your disgust coming partially from being forced into a sexual role that you
did not consider *correct*?
>>   6. My opinion of men will never change, because society won't let men
>>	change.  Think about it!!!
Now, what exactly is "society"?  Society is made up of all of us, including
*you* Trish.  Remember, if nobody does anything, nothing will change.  If
you want society to change, you had better get out there and *do* something
about it.  Sitting in the corner, with your arms folded in front of you, 
refusing to change, won't.
>>   7. I think that men could be sensitive and caring, but that's uncool for
>>	them, because they think they have to be tough.  Think about that too!!They only *think* they have to be tough.  See the above on society.
>>   8. I am not a bigot nor a man-hater. I don't hate anyone, but I do dislike>>      some folks.
If you didn't dislike *someone*, I would have to wonder.  Disliking specific
individuals is perfectly normal.
>>   9. I have a variety of friends; gay, straight, male, & female.
So do I! I even have some that aren't human!
>>  10. I spend time with all my friends - not just the gay ones!
Ditto.

>>Don't be assuming, and trying to be psychiatrists, 'cause you're definitely  >>not qualified!

Well, Trish, I'm not going to try a be a psychiatrist, since I neither have
an M.D. or a PHD in Psych (which should be speedily remedied, however).
However, I have had a few classes in Bio and the Behavioural Sciences (about
180 credit hrs and counting), so maybe I can get away with a *few* words.

First, you are not the first, or the last woman to get stomped on, physically,
or psychologically, by a man or a group of men. I don't think I know a woman
who hasn't.  However, instead of condemming *all* men, women should be
cultivating those that don't exhibit those traits.  If enough people get
together, we *can* make a difference.

Second, I think you have a faulty causality (for those of you who don't know
*anything* about causality, run, don't walk to your nearest Phil dept, and
sign up for a class: I'll wait......).  You appear to have realised that you
were sexually attracted to women before you formed your opinion on men, and
yet, in your earlier article, you claimed to have become a lesbian, because
of your dislike for men.  Did you ever consider that you may have dated
abusive men to rectify in your own mind that your sexual orientation was
correct?  How large is your data base for forming opinions on men?


Well, I've gone on a bit already. I think I'll save some for another article...
Laurie
pucc-k:afo