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From: mitch@cepu.UUCP (Bob Mitchell )
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: limerick, aggies, and Republicans
Message-ID: <334@cepu.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 24-Aug-84 19:07:39 EDT
Article-I.D.: cepu.334
Posted: Fri Aug 24 19:07:39 1984
Date-Received: Wed, 12-Sep-84 03:23:15 EDT
Organization: VA Wadsworth Med. Center; LA CA
Lines: 55

a limerik:

The limerick packs laughs anatomical
into space that is quite economical, 
but the good ones I've seen
are so seldom clean
and the clean ones are so seldom comical.

....and an Aggie joke: 

A farmer in Texas once decided to raise some chickens, so he ordered 200 baby
chicks.  When they arrived he plowed up a field, taking care to make nice,
straight furrows, planted the chicks and carefully watered each one by hand.
The next day, when the farmer went to the field to check his crop, he found
all the chicks were dead.

Not being one to give up easily, the farmer plowed under the dead chicks
and ordered another 200.  Again, he prepared his field and carefully planted
the new chicks when they arrived.  Despite all his care and attention, the
next day all the chicks were dead.  The farmer decided to seek some professional
advice, so he wrote to the Dept. of Agriculture at Texas A&M, describing his
methods and problems.  A few days later came the reply: "Send us a soil sample."

...and offensive to Republicans:

A young man was once walking down a highway, trying to hitch a ride.  
He saw a car approaching and stuck out his thumb.  The car slowed and 
stopped, and the hitchhiker, glad to finally get a ride, ran up to the
car.  As he approached, the driver yelled, "Are you a Democrat or a 
Republican?"  "Uh...I'm a Democrat", responded the young man.  The car
roared off, leaving him in a cloud of dust.

A few miles down the road, he heard another car approach and he flagged
it down.  "Are you a Democrat or Republican?" asked the driver.
"I'm a Democrat", he responded.  VAROOM!! The car speeds away, again
leaving the hitch hiker in a cloud of dust.

He continues walking and eventually a third car stops for him.  The driver
of this car, a sexy young woman in a miniskirt and low-cut blouse, asks
him, "Are you a Democrat or Republican?"  This time he responds, "I'm
a Republican!" and she says, "Hop in, let's go."  

As they drove down the highway, she began to slide her skirt higher and
higher up her legs.  Then, giving him suggestive looks, undoes one button
of her blouse, then the next, and so on.  The guy, who is getting quite excited
by this time, blurts out, "Lady, I've only been a Republican for five
minutes and I feel like screwing someone already!!"
 
......

Okay, that's enough goofing off.   Get back to work.


					Bob Mitchell
					"Waiting for the drugs to take effect."