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Path: utzoo!watmath!water!jbtubman
From: jbtubman@water.UUCP (Jim Tubman)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Church Bulletin Misprints
Message-ID: <68@water.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 22-Oct-84 17:42:41 EDT
Article-I.D.: water.68
Posted: Mon Oct 22 17:42:41 1984
Date-Received: Tue, 23-Oct-84 00:53:31 EDT
Organization: U of Waterloo, Ontario
Lines: 28

	The following excerpts were taken from the Canadian Funeral News,
August 1984, which took them from The Amherstburg (Ontario) Echo, which
in turn took them from the Sarnia Gazette.  Local church boards might want
to take note.

	"There will be a meeting at the South and North end of the church.
	Children will be baptized at both ends."

	"There will be an ice cream social, Tuesday at 4 p.m.  All ladies
	giving milk, please come early."

	"Wednesday, at the Ladies Literary Society, Mrs. Johnson will sing
	Put Me In My Little Bed, accompanied by the Pastor."

	"Thursday there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club.  All
	wishing to become Little Mothers please meet the minister in
	his study."

	"The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind, and
	they can be seen in the church basement on Friday afternoon."

	"This being Easter Sunday, Mrs. Brown will be asked to come forward
	and lay an egg on the alter.  The service will close with Little
	Drops Of Water.  One of the men will start quietly and the rest of
	the congregation will join in."

-----------------------------------------------------------------Jim Tubman