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From: ix200@sdcc6.UUCP (Bruce Jones)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: first dates
Message-ID: <1886@sdcc6.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 28-Jan-85 12:10:06 EST
Article-I.D.: sdcc6.1886
Posted: Mon Jan 28 12:10:06 1985
Date-Received: Fri, 1-Feb-85 01:00:52 EST
References: <322@decwrl.UUCP>
Reply-To: ix200@sdcc6.UUCP (Bruce Jones)
Organization: U.C. San Diego, Academic Computer Center
Lines: 50
Summary: 

In article <322@decwrl.UUCP> malik@helos.DEC (Karl Malik ZK01-1/F22 1-1440) writes:
>Subj; how to handle 'blind' dates
>
>
>	I recently had a blind date (arranged through a dating service). I
>felt awkward. Since we didn't know that much about each other, the evening
>felt like a mutual interrogation. 'So, what do you think of x?' 'Well,
>I think such-and-such, how about you?'.  All that was missing were a couple
>of spotlights shining on us.
>
>
>	Any suggestions for handling an evening with someone you barely
>know?

Having been in this game for several years and tried all the known
variations (answering personal ads, dates arranged by friends,
dating services) I have come up with one hard and fast rule and one
worthwhile observation:

The Rule: Always arange to meet someplace public and to travel in
one's own transportation. This gives you the option of splitting
without having to be concerned about the other person (courtesy
notwithstanding) and prevents possible annoying visits in the
future. 

The Observation: If you are really uncomfortable in a situation or
when you begin to feel like the two of you are talking in two
different languages it's time to end the evening.  Aside from that,
discussions about music, books and movies provide opportunities for
deeper conversations if you take the time to investigate them.  I
have found that some of the best conversations have been with
someone I'v just met.  All it takes is a genuine interest in getting
to know the other person and a willingness to risk some of
yourself.

Additionally I like to meet in restraunts, it's hard to get
to know someone at a movie.

For those of you who are sceptical about this way of meeting people
here's my two cents on the topic: of the more than twenty women I've
met this way two turned out to be good friends, three were lovers of
varying duration and only one was a bad experience.  All of the rest
of the evenings were, in and of themselves, worth the energy and
time expended.

-- 
Bruce Jones

   "I have just begun considering 
      the possibilities of the next disaster"