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From: tim@cmu-cs-k.ARPA (Tim Maroney)
Newsgroups: net.sf-lovers
Subject: Re: Niven's Characters (pseudo-spoiler)
Message-ID: <281@cmu-cs-k.ARPA>
Date: Wed, 20-Feb-85 20:08:59 EST
Article-I.D.: cmu-cs-k.281
Posted: Wed Feb 20 20:08:59 1985
Date-Received: Tue, 26-Feb-85 20:03:01 EST
References: <332@psivax.UUCP>
Organization: Carnegie-Mellon University, CS/RI
Lines: 30

You mean it isn't obvious what happened to Beowulf Schaeffer?  Come on,
think about it.  Obviously on one of his adventures he fell between the
inner and outer event horizons of a black hole and was projected a few
thousand years into the future, to a time shortly before the Core explosion
reached Earth.  Landing on an Earth entirely poulated by Teelas, he was
immediately shanghaied into yet another adventure that netted a gigantic
stasis field generator, high quantum, large enough to envelop the entire
solar system (a product of the technology of the race that created the
Paks).  A ship was positioned on the far side of the solar system from the
core with a time-release stasis field neutralizer.  The stasis field was
activated a year before the first radiation hit Earth.  Thus all the Teelas
and Beowulf Schaeffer were insulated from the effects, and after the brunt
had passed the ship neutralized the stasis field.  Gosh, how lucky for the
Teelas that the only man who could have saved them turned up at the
appropriate moment.  They gave their greatest tribute to Beowulf, said
tribute being jumping out of an airplane without a parachute.
Unfortunately, they didn't realize that without the luck gene, circumstances
would not conspire to save him, and the galaxy's greatest hero wound up only
half a millimeter thick.  So much for greatness.

Stay tuned.  Next time, we find out what happened to Serge Ortega, the
six-armed walrus-snake, and his pet rabbit Bunky.
-=-
Tim Maroney, Carnegie-Mellon University Computation Center
ARPA:	Tim.Maroney@CMU-CS-K	uucp:	seismo!cmu-cs-k!tim
CompuServe:	74176,1360	audio:	shout "Hey, Tim!"

"Remember all ye that existence is pure joy; that all the sorrows are
but as shadows; they pass & are done; but there is that which remains."
Liber AL, II:9.