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From: mitch@cepu.UUCP (Bob Mitchell )
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Leaps tall buildings...
Message-ID: <453@cepu.UUCP>
Date: Thu, 21-Mar-85 19:24:48 EST
Article-I.D.: cepu.453
Posted: Thu Mar 21 19:24:48 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 23-Mar-85 04:13:25 EST
Reply-To: mitch@cepu.UUCP (Bob Mitchell (ADM))
Distribution: net
Organization: VA Wadsworth Med. Center; LA CA
Lines: 68


I don't know where this originated, but I think it's worth posting.

CHAIRMAN OF THE BOARD:
Leaps tall buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful than a locomotive
Is faster than a speeding bullet
Walks on water
Gives policy to God

PRESIDENT:
Leaps short buildings in a single bound
Is more powerful than a switch engine
Is just as fast as a speeding bullet
Walks on water if the sea is calm
Talks with God

EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT:
Leaps short buildings with a running start and favorable winds
Is almost as powerful as a switch engine
Is faster than a speeding BB
Walks on water in an indoor swimming pool
Talks with God if a special request is approved

VICE PRESIDENT:
Barely clears a quonset hut
Loses tug-of-war with a locomotive
Can fire a speeding bullet
Swims well
Is occasionally addressed by God

GENERAL MANAGER:
Makes high marks on the wall when trying to leap buildings
Is run over by locomotive
Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury
Dog paddles
Talks to animals

MANAGER:
Runs into buildings
Recognizes locomotive two out of three times
Is not issued ammunition
Can't stay afloat with a life preserver
Talks to walls

TRAINEE:
Falls over doorsteps when trying to enter buildings
Says "Look at the choo-choo"
Wets himself with a water pistol
Plays in mud puddles
Mumbles to himself

SECRETARY:
Lifts buildings and walks under them
Kicks locomotives off the tracks
Catches speeding bullets in her teeth and eats them
Freezes water with a single glance
She IS God


[I love humanity; it's people I can't stand! --John Lennon]


-- 
Bob Mitchell
UCLA Dept of Neurology
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