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From: krs@amdahl.UUCP (Kris Stephens)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Two more Father Goose tales
Message-ID: <1375@amdahl.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 8-Apr-85 04:07:07 EST
Article-I.D.: amdahl.1375
Posted: Mon Apr  8 04:07:07 1985
Date-Received: Wed, 10-Apr-85 23:44:55 EST
Distribution: net
Organization: Amdahl Corporation, Sunnyvale CA
Lines: 46

As requested:

   Once there was a great (or almost great) pitcher by name of Melvin
Famie.  Like so many others, though, Melvin got old and lost his touch.
He was such a boost to the spirit of the team, however, that the manage-
ment could justify keeping him on the bench just to offer "Hooray!"s.
Melvin, not having to work terribly hard at his new job, took to sipping
a wee bit o' the malt punch at games to keep HIS spirits up, so he could
keep his teammates' spirits up.

   Well, they were hard at work in a long, drawn-out battle with their
cross-state rivals when the manager realized that they were out of
relief pitchers, out of pinch-hitters, and the poor fool on the mound
was looking for a pounding.  He called our hero off the bench to pitch
the top of the ninth, and Mel, on his way up the steps from the dugout,
groped back for not only his glove, but five or six cans of brew, which
he stuffed into his shirt on his way to the mound.  Needless to say, Mel
had a very hard time locating the catcher from the heights of the mound,
and did all the damage required for a loss of the game by the time the
manager swapped him with the right-fielder.  When the inning was finally
over, Mel collapsed against the fence next to the home-team bullpen,
and snored his way happily through the uneventful bottom of the ninth.

   A youngster on the opposing team, totally amazed to have seen such in
"The Majors", inquired of one of his fellows about the hulk up against
the fence.  "That's the great Melvin Famie", said his elder.  "What's the
bulge in his shirt?" asked the tyro.  The reply?

   "That's the beer that made Mel Famie walk us."

========================================================================

Not requested, but I like it:

   Once there was a King who was loved by all of his subjects, especially
because of the hunting excursions he shared with them.  As will happen,
one day he died and his eldest son took the throne.  Now this new king
was an animal-lover to the core, and immediately outlawed all forms of
hunting and fishing.  His subjects accepted this for only a short time
before they ousted him.  This is a truly significant event, because it's
the first time a reign was called on account of the game.

-- 
Kris Stephens     (408-746-6047)                 {whatever}!amdahl!krs
     [The opinions expressed above are mine, solely, and do not    ]
     [necessarily reflect the opinions or policies of Amdahl Corp. ]