Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site unc.UUCP Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!bonnie!akgua!mcnc!unc!fsks From: fsks@unc.UUCP (Frank Silbermann) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: Dates not eating and m/f body image Message-ID: <324@unc.UUCP> Date: Thu, 4-Apr-85 17:43:58 EST Article-I.D.: unc.324 Posted: Thu Apr 4 17:43:58 1985 Date-Received: Sun, 7-Apr-85 03:45:12 EST References: <475@spp2.UUCP> <> <255@lasspvax.UUCP> <174@tektools.UUCP> <2342@mit-hermes.ARPA> Reply-To: fsks@unc.UUCP (Frank Silbermann) Organization: CS Dept., U. of N. Carolina at Chapel Hill Lines: 64 Summary: In article edhall@randvax.UUCP (Ed Hall) writes: > > I think the women that are picking at their food on dates > > are in a double bind. On the one hand, they're trying > > to meet *your* expectations and on the other hand, > > they're trying to meet society's (read *men's*) > > expectations of women to be slender. > > Barbara Zanzig > I have to disagree about this being a conspiracy of men. > The advertising industry is pretty well sexually integrated > (especially compared to most other areas of American business), > and it is there that you should place the blame. Nonsense. Stop trying to pass the buck. We men are responsible. The advertising media doesn't tell us which women to desire. I've never seen an advertisement which said, "Hey you! This is what a beautiful woman looks like!" The advertisers FIRST find out which female image the public adores and THEN use it to sell the product. They would have no reason to try to sell the image of beauty as well. No profit in that. > Literally tens of billions of dollars are spent by people pursuing > the body image hyped by advertising. As I said above, advertising doesn't hype the body image. The body image hypes the product. Or, are you refering to advertisements in which the product IS beauty (a diet plan, or membership in a health spa)? These advertisements wouldn't work if there wasn't already a general consensus of what beautiful women look like. > Most women I've known consider themselves overweight, > or at least ``would like to drop a few pounds''. > Most men I've known would disagree--only a small minority > seems to actually prefer the skinny figure these women are > trying to achieve. When my girlfriend gains 3 pounds, it worries her terribly, whereas I don't even notice it. To me it's just 3 pounds, but to her, it's the first step toward gaining fifty pounds. Her fears are realistic. After the mid-twenties, it's very easy for a woman (or man) to gain a LOT of weight (especially if the woman has had a few kids). Very rarely do I meet a woman who I think would look better with more weight. Very often, the reverse is true, especially if the woman naturally has a large bone structure. > So, when you talk about ``society's'' expectations, > consider just what it is you're talking about. > Do you pursue being slender because the men in your life > prefer you that way? Or do you do it because you have learned, > from advertising and from comparison with other women > (who are chasing the same mirage), that ``slender'' > is somehow ``better''? She probably realizes that with the "ideal" figure, she will have more (and perhaps better looking) men to choose from. Frank Silbermann