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From: larry@hpfcla.UUCP (larry)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: More Songs with Funny Lyrics
Message-ID: <2000036@hpfcla.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 12-Apr-85 22:16:00 EST
Article-I.D.: hpfcla.2000036
Posted: Fri Apr 12 22:16:00 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 18-Apr-85 02:35:29 EST
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Nf-From: hpfcla!larry    Apr 12 19:16:00 1985

More Lyrics to Funny Songs

Does anyone have the lyrics or the name of the artist for any of these 3 songs:
1) "There's a Fungus Among Us" - Unknown Artist.
2) (Unknown title): Unknown Artist.  This song is sung to the tune of Roberta
   Flack's "Killing Me Softly With His Song".  It is sung by a man, and the 
   refrain goes something like this:
   "Now he's strummin' my face with his fingers,
    Changing my nose with his foot.
    Killing me softly with Kung Fu, killing me softly with Kung Fu,
    Changing my outlook with his shoe.
    Killing me softly with Kung Fu."
3) "The Chicken Cordon Bleus" - Unknown Artist.  The basic plot to the song as
   I remember it, is that this guy had a girlfriend who at first was feeding him
   good food.  But once they got married or lived together or whatever, she
   switched to all-vegetarian food: red beans, rice, lintels, etc.  The refrain
   included: "I've got the ...??... and the Chicken Cordon Blues".  By the end
   of the song, he's getting madder and madder, and finally is leaving her to go
   out and have a delicious meal, mostly of meat, which he describes in great
   detail in the last verse.

And for anyone who cares, here are the lyrics to a song I don't own a recording
of, so bear with me if my memory fails in any place:

Crossin' the highway late last night...
He should'a look'a left and he should'a look'a right.
He didn' see the station wagon car.
The skunk got squashed, and, there you are.

Ya got your dead skunk in the middle of the road,
Dead skunk in the middle of the road,
Dead skunk in the middle of the road, an' he's a stinkin' to HIIGHHHH heaven.

Take a whiff on me, that ain't no rose.
Roll up your win'ow an' hol' your nose.
Ya don' hafta look, an' ya don' hafta see,
'Cuz ya can feel it in your olfactory.

Ya got your dead skunk in the middle of the road,
Dead skunk in the middle of the road,
Dead skunk in the middle of the road, an' he's a stinkin' to HIIGHHHH heaven.

OHHHH, ya gotcher dead cat, you got yer dead dog,
On a moonlit night ya gotcher dead bullfrog.
Gotcher dead rabbit, you gotcher racoon.
Oh, the blood an' the guts, they gonna make you swoooooon, Ohhhhhhh!!

Dead skunk.
In the middle,
Dead skunk in the middle of the road,
Dead skunk in the middle of the road, an' he's a stinkin' to HIIGHHHH heaven.

Go on, staaaiiink!

You got it, it's dead.  It's in the middle, dead skunk in the middle of the road
(etc.)
-----------------------------------------
The song is of course "Dead Skunk" from about 1972, and I believe is by
Louden P. Wainwright, III  (spelling?)