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From: allan@nmtvax.UUCP
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: The Dating Game
Message-ID: <437@nmtvax.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 26-Apr-85 09:07:42 EDT
Article-I.D.: nmtvax.437
Posted: Fri Apr 26 09:07:42 1985
Date-Received: Mon, 29-Apr-85 00:30:04 EDT
Distribution: na
Organization: New Mexico Tech, Socorro
Lines: 39


                   Harlan Ellison on the Dating Game.

Many years ago, after the Dating Game had just been introduced, Harlan Ellison
went on the show.  This is definitely among videotape I'd like to see.  I left
out the answers of the other two contestants, because they are, at their best,
trivial.

Contestant:  Number Three, do you have any bad habits?

Ellison:  Well, frankly, no.  My friends say I'm without flaw, if you ignore
          the fact that I'm an ax murderer and rapist.
          But everybody has a few minor character flaws.

Contestant:  Number Three, describe what we'd do if you took me out, what kind
             of an evening you'd consider a big date.

Ellison:  Well, for you I would plan a formal evening with you in Pucci gown
          and me in tuxedo.  I would have the chef at Scandia prepare for us
          a picnic dinner of breast of guinea hen under glass and jeroboams
          of champagne -- Taittinger's Blanc de Blanc '45 possibly -- and then
          I would have us, with our dinner, chauffered out to the city dump
          where, with ivory-handled .45s, we would sip bubbly and amuse
          ourselves by shooting rats.

Contestant:  Tell me, Number Three, how you would go about convincing me I
             should go out with you.

Ellison:  [Tired of the entire mess] Convince you, you idiot!  I wouldn't go
          out with you if they offered me the governorship of Hawaii as
          inducement.  You, and this whole dumb show can go take a sunbath in
          a cyclotron! [Exit]

Someone in back:  Burn that goddamn tape!

Well, I thought it was funny.

Allan F. Perry
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