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From: fsks@unc.UUCP (Frank Silbermann)
Newsgroups: net.singles,net.social
Subject: What people look for in MOTAS
Message-ID: <147@unc.UUCP>
Date: Sat, 4-May-85 15:17:04 EDT
Article-I.D.: unc.147
Posted: Sat May  4 15:17:04 1985
Date-Received: Mon, 6-May-85 01:03:25 EDT
Organization: CS Dept., U. of N. Carolina at Chapel Hill
Lines: 51
Xref: watmath net.singles:6897 net.social:505


I'd like to return to the discussion about characteristics we look for
in potential mates.  Many netters wrote that they decide primarily
on the basis of personality and character -- not looks.  Most netters
required only that the motas meet some "minimal standard of attractiveness."

Since most people eventually do find SOMEBODY, I can only assume that
most people do indeed possess at least some sex appeal.  So why do
homely men have so much more trouble attracting beautiful women?
Why do homely women have so much trouble attracting desirable men?
Why, with most couples, are both partners comparably good looking?
If people really do choose their mates primarily on the basis of
character and personality, why aren't the pairings more random
with respect to looks?

For many year I believed that people simply lied about what was really
important to them (how cynical!).  But recently, an article in
Psychology Today explained the answer:

	When judging your personality and character,
	people are heavily influenced by how good-looking
	you are.

Think about it.  Here are a few examples:

	A beautiful woman who is assertive and willful "has a lot of spunk."
	An ugly woman who is assertive an willful is a "masculine, castrating
	bitch."

	A handsome man who is assertive and willful is "ambitious" or
	"on the move."
	An ugly man who is assertive and willful is "pushy and obnoxious."

	Someone both good-looking and brilliant is "a real winner."
	Someone ugly, but brilliant, is a "nerd" or a "grind."

	A handsome man who is stupid is "your average All-American boy".
	A beautiful woman who is stupid is "an ingenuous and innocent"
	Someone both ugly and stupid is "a real loser."

	A beautiful, sexually agressive woman is "modern and liberated."
	An ugly, sexually aggressive woman is "a cheap slut."

	A handsome man who makes indecent suggestions to you is "frisky."
	An ugly man who makes indecent suggestions to you is a "sick and
	perverted creep."

See how easy it it?  How do I personally choose my own dates, you ask?
Why, I go on the basis of personality and character, just like you guys!

	Frank Silbermann