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Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!allegra!princeton!jansic
From: jansic@princeton.UUCP (Hugh R. Jansic)
Newsgroups: net.music,net.rumor
Subject: Re: Kate Bush's new album
Message-ID: <1076@princeton.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 3-Jun-85 02:11:06 EDT
Article-I.D.: princeto.1076
Posted: Mon Jun  3 02:11:06 1985
Date-Received: Wed, 5-Jun-85 00:20:57 EDT
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Xref: watmath net.music:7770 net.rumor:858

[RAMBO the Bug eater!]

	Let me set you straight on a few things about Kate Bush. Kate (or Binky 
	as she is also known ) is the most hostile and competitive 
	person I have ever met. I should know because she used to sleep with
	my older brother when they were in high school together. Thank God 
	they never got serious or else my brother would never have obtained
	his college degree and now be working as a computer programmer (ada,
	pascal, c++, and smalltalk).

	Timmy (my brother) was so in love with Binky that he was not able to
	see how sadistic and cruelly Binky treated the rest of our family. Like
	the time I asked Binky to sign the cast on my broken leg. Instead of 
	signing my cast she crazy-glued two old diaphragms to the part of the
	cast just behind my inner thigh. I chafed horribly for the next two
	weeks. Binky didn't feel sorry for me she would just laugh. Other
	times she would give me an Indian sunburn or snap paper-clips at my eyes.

	What made Timmy see the kind of person Binky really was? We were planning
	a birthday party for my mother. Everybody was going to attend, even Binky.
	Binky and my mother didn't get along very well. So Timmy was glad that
	Binky was helping with the party plans. My job was to get the cake.
	I saw a beautiful birthday cake at Murray's Bake Shop and used my own
	money (actually Timmy loaned me some) to buy it for mother. It was
	the best cake I ever saw. It had white icing with blue and red roses on
	the top next to the words "Mother we love you." 
	
	I had placed the cake in a safe place on the kitchen counter minutes
	before mother was to arrive home from the factory. The whole family
	and all our friends hid when we saw mother getting off the bus at the
	corner. When mother stepped inside the front door we all jumped up and
	yelled "suprise." It was so wonderful to see mother so happy. I cried 
	with joy. So did Timmy; so did everybody! Mother opened all her gifts
	while I went to get the cake. I was so proud to show mother the birthday
	cake I brought for her. It was lovely just like mother. Mother rose
	from her seat to give me a great big hug and kiss. She said it was the
	best birthday she ever had. 

	I gave Mother the knife to cut the first piece of cake when Binky said
	"Wait Mother Jansic you haven't seen my present."

	Binky's present to Mother was the title to our home.  Binky
	used the advance from her first record to pay off the mortgage.
	Binky said she would give the title to the house to Mother only
	on the coniditon that Mother never speak to Binky again.  Tearfully,
	Mother agreed to the deal to preserve the happy mood of the party,
	and to keep the family together.  But Binky wouldn't stop.  She
	just got louder and drunker and more abusive.  The party broke up
	when Binky backed her new car into the family room.  We were all
	crying, especially Timmy, when the roof to the family room
	collasped.  Meanwhile Binky was slumped over the steering wheel,
	heaving in paroxysms of laughter.  In fact she found the whole
	episode so entertaining that she vomitted over her new dashboard.
	It was so gross.  I can never forgive her.  It was events like
	these that lead to Timmy and Binky breaking up.