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From: regard@ttidcc.UUCP (Adrienne Regard)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: friends and lovers
Message-ID: <465@ttidcc.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 10-Jun-85 17:19:03 EDT
Article-I.D.: ttidcc.465
Posted: Mon Jun 10 17:19:03 1985
Date-Received: Fri, 14-Jun-85 05:03:09 EDT
Organization: TTI, Santa Monica, CA.
Lines: 35

Newsgroups: net.singles


>I am curious about what people have to say about relationships that have
>developed with MOTOS that they had previously been good friends with.
>>From reading alot of net.singles, I have gotten the impression that it
>tends to happen more often with people who dont consider themselves very
>attractive (good-looking, strong, sociable, etc).  Do other people notice
>this?

I've only done this once, and it's lasted 3 years. (I knew him for 5 years
prior, and set him up with my best friend for a 2 year relationship).
I'll admit that during the early days of our MOTOS relationship there was
a lot of wondering about "what did I say" from BEFORE when we were just
friends (like all the junk I'd told him about old boyfriends who were jerks)
but that died down pretty quick.  We were also both very concerned that the
friendship might die if truly replaced by a romantic relationship.  We were
wrong.

It wasn't particularly easy, sometimes, since I am not usually _attracted_
to my friends, and some of the qualities that I appreciate in friends aren't
qualities I like in lovers, but all in all its the most sensible, secure,
happy, dependable, committed relationship I've had in years.  My office
mates insist there must be something wrong because I never complain about
him at work.

I'd recommend it to others.  Though many of the people I've talked with have
echoed my feeling above -- they aren't usually attracted to friends.


P.S., neither of us are wildly attractive, but we have both had our fair
share of choice in the past.  And, per the other discussion, we are both
rather intelligent, and have some similar interests in common, but our work
environments are completely unrelated, I am probably more intelligent on
some abstract scale than he is, though it don't matter nohow.