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From: chuqui@nsc.UUCP (Chuq Von Rospach)
Newsgroups: net.singles,net.philosophy,net.religion
Subject: Re: Comments on -Sex
Message-ID: <2880@nsc.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 21-Jun-85 13:28:03 EDT
Article-I.D.: nsc.2880
Posted: Fri Jun 21 13:28:03 1985
Date-Received: Sun, 23-Jun-85 04:23:25 EDT
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Reply-To: chuqui@nsc.UUCP (Chuq Von Rospach)
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Summary: 

[future followups to this article are being redirected to net.singles as
the most appropriate place for them]

>	Nice sentiment, Colin, but marriage IS commitment and the MOST
>	commitment IS marriage.

I'll agree marriage is commitment, but the obverse is true because of
it.  Marriage is simply a social convention for a public announcement
of your commitment. If you have a true commitment, you don't NEED
marriage to prove your commitment to anyone, including your God.  This
doesn't mean that you might not WANT marriage. If the commitment is a
strong one, making sure the world knows about it is an obvious
response.

The reality is that 1 of 2 marriages ends in divorce. The MTBF of a
marriage is 5-7 years. It is obvious that many people don't understand
the difference between marriage and commitment.  Marriage is NOT a
commitment, but an announcement of commitment.  If you expect the
announcement to take the place of the commitment, you're in trouble.
Good relationships can work just as well outside of marriage as they do
inside of marriage if the couple wants it to. Bad relationships fail
regardless.

As an official statistic in the marriage game, I know from experience
that many people believe in the fantasy of 'They lived happily ever
after'.  It is quite easy to get married. It is much harder to stay
married.  I wish more people realized this.

>I suggest that there is much PRACTICAL value in most moral "rules" and 
>it probably pays in the long run.  Not only are there VD things and AIDS
>to avoid but there are positive benefits from having that "first time" with
>Someone With Whom You Are Totally And Mutually Committed (virtually married).

You forgot herpes, stomach flu and communism. If you masterbate, you'll
grow hair on the palms of your hands (Hmm... where IS my razor?).  Any
time you do something to excess and don't take proper care you are
going to get burnt.  People who are indiscriminate in their partners
are more likely to have a problem than people who aren't, and people
who don't know whether or not their potential partner is indiscriminate
is being indiscriminate.

>Has anyone out there forgotten your "first love"? (any base counts as a 'hit'!)

Oh, yes. 14, varicose veins in the nose, and (in retrospect) a total bitch.
No, I'll never forget her. Made my ex-wife look angelic. Made ME look
angelic.
-- 
:From the misfiring synapses of:                  Chuq Von Rospach
{cbosgd,fortune,hplabs,ihnp4,seismo}!nsc!chuqui   nsc!chuqui@decwrl.ARPA

The offices were very nice, and the clients were only raping the land, and
then, of course, there was the money...