Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 9/5/84; site oliven.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!prls!amdimage!amdcad!decwrl!sun!idi!oliven!rap From: rap@oliven.UUCP (Robert A. Pease) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: Hurting the other by a "no" Message-ID: <376@oliven.UUCP> Date: Sat, 27-Jul-85 19:46:22 EDT Article-I.D.: oliven.376 Posted: Sat Jul 27 19:46:22 1985 Date-Received: Tue, 30-Jul-85 04:57:18 EDT References: <5557@cbscc.UUCP> <591@unc.UUCP> Organization: Olivetti ATC; Cupertino, Ca Lines: 27 > What disturbs me most about this school of thinking that > you appear to be espousing is that when you claim Joe has > complete responsibility for his emotions, you are freeing yourself > from any responsibility for them, thereby leaving yourself > free to hurt him with impunity. I believe that TO A CERTAIN > EXTENT (limits subject to debate), we are all responsible > for the feelings of our fellow humans. No, no, no. You are confusing being responsible for your actions to another and the other's reactions to your original actions. > Disclaiming or rejecting responsibility for the effect your > actions have on someone's emotions may make yourself feel > better (and more able to become The Best Person You Can > Possibly Be), but it strikes me as selfish and insensitive. > > Pooh Golly, I think it would be more selfish and insensitive to blame someone for your feelings. "You MADE me feel this way!" "I did not. I only told you that you couldn't have a cookie." -- Robert A. Pease {hplabs|zehntel|fortune|ios|tolerant|allegra|tymix}!oliveb!oliven!rap