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From: benson@dcdwest.UUCP (Peter Benson)
Newsgroups: net.women
Subject: Re: Who's watching the kids?
Message-ID: <199@dcdwest.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 16-Jul-85 11:17:58 EDT
Article-I.D.: dcdwest.199
Posted: Tue Jul 16 11:17:58 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 20-Jul-85 11:44:14 EDT
References: <385@boulder.UUCP>
Reply-To: benson@dcdwest.UUCP (Peter Benson)
Distribution: net
Organization: ITT Defense Communications (San Diego)
Lines: 39
Summary: 

As a long-time single parent, I have some experiences to share
concerning the watching of children during the day.  My
children went to a university day care center starting at 4
years for the elder and 7 months for the younger.  The older
one had been in other child care during the first years of her
life.  I became involved in the day care center, doing my
co-op time, cleaning, cooking, and helping to manage the
place.  I feel that my children got quality care during the
day, which included love and individual attention.

This experience with day care has left me with the conviction
that parents can leave their children at day care centers with
no ill effects.  I reserve one proviso: parent involvement is
essential.  This involvement should be both effective and
visible.  By effective I mean that if something needs work,
one must be ready to help fix it.  Note that I did not say
"if something is wrong".  One problem I experienced with day
care parents is their readiness to cite the day care for
failings they themselves had.

By visible, I mean visible to the children.  I earned a lot of
credibility with my kids by helping build a fence.  They
considered it their fence.  What's more they considered the
center their center.  Both have returned to volunteer their
services now that they are teens.

Finally, I feel that good day care gives parents the freedom
to continue to grow and develop.  Being a parent has its
points and I can think of nothing which has given me more
emotional nutrition, but full-time parenting as a life's work is 
and was not for me.  Now that my kids are leaving the nest, I
am glad I have a career and friends outside the home to
provide the support I need.
-- 
                                _
Peter Benson                    | ITT Defense Communications Division
(619)578-3080                   | 10060 Carroll Canyon Road
decvax!ittvax!dcdwest!benson    | San Diego, CA 92131
ucbvax!sdcsvax!dcdwest!benson   |