Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.1 6/24/83; site bu-cs.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!harvard!bu-cs!jts From: jts@bu-cs.UUCP (Joe Szep) Newsgroups: net.bizarre Subject: A New Language Message-ID: <561@bu-cs.UUCP> Date: Sat, 10-Aug-85 18:43:21 EDT Article-I.D.: bu-cs.561 Posted: Sat Aug 10 18:43:21 1985 Date-Received: Mon, 12-Aug-85 08:28:30 EDT Organization: Boston Univ Comp. Sci. Lines: 71 [INSERT YOUR FAVORITE SLAM DANCE MOVE HERE] How about a net.bizarre group effort to write a new programming language? It should be timely and vogue and offend everyone (sorta like the fashion industry). My proposal is for: PPL (Punk Programming Language) Specifications: 1) No syntax. Do whatever you want, who cares? It won't work anyway. 2) No comments. Punks can't read. 3) There is a 50% chance the compiler will not generating error messages. 4) The instruction set makes it impossible to write a working program. 5) Every program allocates ALL system resources and then doesn't use them. 6) All communications occur at 25 M-bits and 120 dB. 7) If a program fails well enough, it is automatically overwrites /vmunix and then crash the system. 8) No labels; you aren't going anywhere anyway. 9) No arithmetic statements; punks can't add. 10) No logic statements; punks can't think. 11 - N) *** Now it's YOUR TURN!!!! Instruction Set: (don't tell ME what to do....) BOOT kick the cpu REBOOT kick it again BREAK disk, memory, neck DON'T exact opposite of traditional DO DDD required at top of each program to set mood, (short for Death, Doom, and Destruction) JUMP
off-the-stage NOT used with DON'T POKE safety-pin,cheek PUSH, POP person-next-to-you SLAM Shift Left And Mutilate STORE
lose information at address RESTORE
you can't, it's lost. ZERO wipe out everything and start over (more????) The seeds of doom have been planted. Do your worsest, netheads. "If you dance the same and dress the same, it won't be long 'til you are the same. You look the same and act the same, there's nothing new and you're to blame. This is Boston, not L.A. This is Boston, not L.A. This is Boston, fuck L.A." - The Freeze =;-] -- =============================================================================== Joe Szep Boston University Academic Computing Center UUCP: ...!harvard!bu-cs!jts ARPA: jts%bu-cs.csnet@csnet-relay.arpa Pony Express: 111 Cummington St. Boston, Ma. 02215 617-353-2780 ===============================================================================