Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.2 (Tek) 9/28/84 based on 9/17/84; site hammer.UUCP Path: utzoo!linus!philabs!cmcl2!seismo!lll-crg!dual!qantel!hplabs!tektronix!orca!hammer!seifert From: seifert@hammer.UUCP (Snoopy) Newsgroups: net.singles Subject: Re: "The Invisible Partners" Message-ID: <1433@hammer.UUCP> Date: Mon, 12-Aug-85 02:38:57 EDT Article-I.D.: hammer.1433 Posted: Mon Aug 12 02:38:57 1985 Date-Received: Sat, 17-Aug-85 06:38:29 EDT References: <2135@pucc-h> <1718@mnetor.UUCP> Reply-To: seifert@hammer.UUCP (Snoopy) Organization: The Daisy Hill Puppy Farm Lines: 73 Summary: How to become perfectly integrated in ten easy lessions In article <1718@mnetor.UUCP> sophie@mnetor.UUCP (Sophie Quigley) writes: >What about us women, eh? can't we integrate too? I'm jealous of you, Dave. >but, but, Jeff, just think what a beautiful person you could get if you >started with a woman.... What do you mean *if*? Just how do you think we perfectly integrated types got that way? "Hormone tablets?" NO! "Seminars?" NO! "Judicial order?" NO! How then? "Oh please Master Snoopy! Please tell us the secret to perfect integration!" It's quite simple really. "How? How?" Perhaps you've heard the phrase "the two shall become one flesh"? Well, during the *perfect* session of lovemaking, it is possible for this to become literally true. The two become one. "Wow!", says Sophie. Jeff's eyes are beginning to glaze over. "Master Snoopy?", continues Sophie. Yes? "You are... physically...a...male." Yes. The male precurser was facing Mecca at the instant of integration. Do not worry about such things. They are unimportant to the perfectly integrated individual. "Is this *perfect* session of lovemaking difficult to attain?" The critical factor is finding the perfect partner. You have to find someone who balances your strengths and weaknesses absolutely perfectly. This perfect match is quite rare. Once you have found your partner, you must build a suitable place for the integration to occur. We carved a spa into the top of Mount Hood, and ran super-insulated pipes from a natural hot springs. Our spa was four cubits by six cubits. "That sounds nice. Would it be alright if I took a look at your spa to get ideas?" I'm sorry Sophie, the spa was vaporized by the intense energy given off during the integration process. Also, please note that the place of integration must be right for you and your partner. It will be right for noone else. The place of integration must be built with your own four hands. No power tools, no contractors. "Does this mean I have to get... ma-ma-married?" Yes Jeff, for you the perfect session of lovemaking could only occur in marriage. "May I use your phone?" Of course, Sophie. "Hi Sweety! I'll be coming back on the next flight, could you do be a favor and cancel my CS925 course, and sign me up for intro basketweaving? Yes, that's right, I'll explain later, Honey. Bye" -------------------------------------------------------- Snoopy tektronix!hammer!seifert