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Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbosgd!cbdkc1!desoto!packard!hoxna!houxm!vax135!cornell!lasspvax!chu
From: chu@lasspvax.UUCP (Clare Chu)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: SO's in the medical profession
Message-ID: <481@lasspvax.UUCP>
Date: Sun, 25-Aug-85 10:59:57 EDT
Article-I.D.: lasspvax.481
Posted: Sun Aug 25 10:59:57 1985
Date-Received: Tue, 27-Aug-85 06:16:18 EDT
References: <469@lasspvax.UUCP>
Reply-To: chu@lasspvax.UUCP (Clare Chu)
Organization: LASSP, Cornell University
Lines: 42
Keywords: aargh!

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I'm reposting since some of the lines got eaten


In article <469@lasspvax.UUCP> chu@lasspvax.UUCP (Clare Chu) writes:
>
>  Perhaps this can be a starting point for new discussions?
>I don't know how many of you are in this situation, but it
>can get quite aggravating.  My fiance is a third year medical
>student.  Through the last three years I have been very
>patient and understanding, doing all the traveling to go see
>him and not bothering him when he has tests or is on call.
>
>  In June he took the National Boards Part I.  As it turns out
>he flunked it.  About a month ago, he called me and desperately
>wanted me to go comfort him.  Now he's studying for them again
>and still wants me to see him.  However he says that if he
>flunks it again, he'll disappear from society--leave his
>parents and friends ( me included)...   Now what am I supposed
>to do?  There really is nothing that I can do except accept
>it.  However he'll most likely pass them and in that case
>he wants me to think about marrying him.  Is this a bit bizarre?
>He says the other medical students are just as hyper has he is.
>One girl fainted at the test, a friend passed out when he got his
>scores...  Anyway I'm sort of in limbo, aren't I?  What should
>I do?  Maybe if I'm really self-actualized I'd just not worry
>about it.  But it seems a catch-22.  If I drop him now, he'll
>get depressed and then blame me if he flunks again.  If he passes,
>he'll say that I didn't have faith in him.  I would just rather
>stick with him, and that would be allright if he passes, but if
>he doesn't...I'll feel even more hurt because I would be the
>one who was dropped.  The thing that makes this so tough is that
>we get along great and really care for each other and that his
>leaving has nothing to do with me...(boo hoo hoo)  :-( 
>
>this is not a joke...it's for real
>
>any suggestions will be appreciated
>                                    -Clare
>