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From: cfs@uvacs.UUCP (Cathy Summers)
Newsgroups: net.women
Subject: Re: Sunny's comments and opposition to assertive women
Message-ID: <2364@uvacs.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 11-Sep-85 11:38:41 EDT
Article-I.D.: uvacs.2364
Posted: Wed Sep 11 11:38:41 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 14-Sep-85 05:51:41 EDT
References: <194@decwrl.UUCP>
Reply-To: cfs@uvacs.UUCP (Cathy Summers)
Organization: U.Va. CS dept.  Charlottesville, VA
Lines: 96
Keywords: transsexual
Summary: 

>Rob DeMillo 
>> 
>> Pumping yourself up with hormones, and assuming the personna of someone
>> of the opposite gender does not give you the right to proclaim
>> "womanhood." (A little drug alteration never hurt anybody, eh?)

As Sunny stated, we are changing to the correct not opposite gender.

Yes, I too am a transsexual.  I have been somewhat shy about contributing
to this discussion because I am currently seeking employment and lost one
job when I told a prospective employer that I was in the process of changing
my sex (they were willing to let me come to work under any name that I
chose but until the sex reassignment process was completed I would have had
to "function as a male" while at work) and didn't want to risk losing other
offers.  I am also no glutton for punishment (the friction between myself
and my parents that my decision has caused is enough), and given the
attacks on Sunny, I didn't want to open myself up for any similar shots.

I can't give you any definitive answers on what causes transsexualism,
nor can I analyze what the effects of the therapy are for anyone but myself.
I can support Sunny's original claim that groups of males only do show a
preoccupation with sex and sexual jokes and comments.  I've observed this
while working in a McDonalds as a teenager, with the upper middle class
kids with whom I went to school, and the relatively "educated" people
from diverse backgrounds who are fellow graduate students.  I'm not saying
that ALL males act that way; I'm just saying that a lot do.

As to Sunny's comments about the changes in mental outlook produced by the
estrogen therapy

> My only expectations were of physical changes to my body, i.e. the reason for
> taking them was related to my transition from male to female body
> characteristics.  My observations of mental changes were unexpected, and are
> mostly of less agression/assertion/sex-obsession and  more passive/peaceful/
> sensuality/emotionality.

I too take estrogens to produce physical changes in my body.  From readings
in the medical literature and in the ordinary press, I knew that with the
increase in the ratio of estrogens to testosterone I could experience a
decrease in my libido (read: sexual drive) and an increase in physical
sensitivity and sensuality.  I didn't expect that I'd become more patient
or empathic, but I have.  I don't know that these changes are directly
attributable to the hormones, or are simply coming about as I am finally
reaching a more stable existence.

For the previous several years, as I tried to deny the feeling that I am
a female, I led a strange life.  The part of me that was trying to deny my
transsexualism tied to be strong and masculine, mentally and physically.
I know that it is not necessary to be "a macho stud" to be a male; I know
that males can be nice sensitive people (at least that's the rumor I hear :-),
but underneath it all I disliked my body and the roles society offered.
I tried various methods of denying the feelings and convincing myself
that I was a male, and that I wanted to live my life as a male.  I used to
feel somewhat schizophrenic; that I was a male and a female, and that the
two were separate identities as I tried to disassociate my public persona
from my true feelings.  Two years ago, I decided that I could no longer
deny the feelings.

I've been taking estrogens on a monthly cycle for the last eighteen months.
Yes, there are some days in the cycle when I don't feel as good as others,
but I don't think that my mental capabilities are at all diminished during
those periods.  The estrogens have had the desired effect of starting the
development of female secondary sex characteristics.  Also, as I mentioned
above, I find that I am more patient and empathic.  Is this due to the
estrogens or due to an easing of the tensions in my life?  I'm not sure.

Now that I accept what and who I am and the consequences of my decision,
I am definitely happier.  I no longer feel like two people or try to hide
part of my feelings or history in another "person".  With the exception of
this audience, I also do not broadcast the fact that I was a male.  While
there are still some parts of my body that I dislike, I now know that
it is only a matter of time before I'll be complete.

L.S. Chabot wrote
>                                       Everybody's growing up experience is
>different, I don't say Sunny speaks for me, but I sure do think she has an
>interesting background from which to speak, very different from mine but no less
>valid.
>
and
>                                             With crud like this, we may never
>convince Sunny or another (declared) transsexual to contribute.  Whatever you
>may think of the treatment, can't you see that it means a tremendous amount to
>that persons undergoing it?  If Sunny makes comments about male hormones that
>you find cruel, discuss (or whatever) *that*.  If you're problem is instead
>a hangup or ignorance about transsexuals, why don't you suspend your hangup for
>just awhile and see if you can't learn something--what do you think many of the
>rest of us have been doing?!
>

It is in response to her statement that she is trying to "learn something"
that prompted me to contribute.  I hope that this article helped those of
you who wanted to learn more about transsexualism through the feelings and
thoughts of another transsexual.

Cathy Summers  ...decvax!mcnc!ncsu!uvacs!cfs