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From: dta@cpsc53.UUCP (Doug Anderson)
Newsgroups: net.suicide
Subject: Re: misc. ramblings
Message-ID: <85128@cpsc53.UUCP>
Date: Tue, 17-Sep-85 09:27:25 EDT
Article-I.D.: cpsc53.85128
Posted: Tue Sep 17 09:27:25 1985
Date-Received: Thu, 19-Sep-85 03:47:27 EDT
References: <199@ikonas.UUCP>
Organization: ATT-IS CPSC, Atlanta, GA
Lines: 75

> I'd like to know how other people get over the various humps in their lives.
> Currently I'm questioning my reason for being, and haven't found any
> answers I'll accept.  I'm sure other people must occasionly get into
> this state of mind.
> 
> I don't have any dependents, and I never had.  I know at least a half-dozen
> people in this area that could do my job as well or better than I can.
> The only friends I have I made at work, and most of them now work somewhere
> else and I don't see them very often.  I have no social life, because
> I'm always fixing problems to stop customers from screaming.  The customer
> is screaming because some one else sat on the problem for months, and now
> we're way over a deadline.  I gave up a social life long ago when I went
> for 2 degrees in four years while working part time.  My social skills are
> nill, and I doubt that anyone would really want to associate with someone
> whose work is his total life.  Someone called me a nerd at work today,
> and I just realized it must be true.
> 
> I've heard that someone who attempts suicide is really looking for attention.
> If that is true, why have I planned my own suicide in great detail, such that
> it would look like an accident or a murder?  I don't want my suicide to
> upset the few people that might care for me, whomever they are.
> 
> I'm sorry this has gone on for so long.  I hoped maybe letting out some
> of my feelings would prevent me from wrapping my car around a tree.
> 


	This sounds like me a couple of months ago so I know
	where your comming from.  

	For my two cents worth it sounds like it's time for a
	new job. I've always viewed life as being in three
	parts:

		1) work - 8 hours
		2) play - 8 hours
		3) sleep - 8 hours

	I don't know anyone that gets their full 8 hour quota
	of play or sleep and most end up spending 10 to 12
	hours a day at work.  If your not happy in any one of
	these three areas then its time for a major change.

	Is suicide the answer? I don't know. I look at that
	answer as abdicating in a chess game that you cant
	win.  My problem with that answer is that I'm too
	stupid to quit and I just try another gambit.

	Before taking the ultimate response, remember there is
	no turning back from suicide, why not trying to change
	jobs or living area or both.  What have you got to
	lose??  If that doesn't work you can always drop back
	to plan B.  The job I used to be involved in was
	totally controlled by the customer.  They ran us like
	dogs for 6 months and whatever we did was wrong.  Is
	that my fault. NO. I changed my outlook and it helped
	it may help you. 

	If changing your job does work then you are "still in
	the game" and if your in the game you always have a
	percentage chance of winning. what ever that means.

	I've always believed in burning as few bridges as
	possible. Suicide burns them all.  It is a legimate
	response to an impossible situation. Make sure your in
	that impossible situation before you make that
	response.  Try everything else first. After all, what
	have you got to lose?


	Doug Anderson


	While I'm an employee of AT&T I am not a spokesman for
	AT&T or any of its subsidaries.


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