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From: arnold@ucsfcgl.UUCP (Ken Arnold%CGL)
Newsgroups: net.women
Subject: Re: Name Changes ("traditions that have evolved" disappearing)
Message-ID: <653@ucsfcgl.UUCP>
Date: Wed, 25-Sep-85 03:32:57 EDT
Article-I.D.: ucsfcgl.653
Posted: Wed Sep 25 03:32:57 1985
Date-Received: Sat, 28-Sep-85 04:31:34 EDT
References: <5211@elsie.UUCP> <11302@rochester.UUCP> <508@osiris.UUCP> <11313@rochester.UUCP> <2803@wateng.UUCP> <11728@rochester.UUCP>
Reply-To: arnold@ucsfcgl.UUCP (Ken Arnold)
Organization: UCSF Computer Graphics Lab
Lines: 33

In article <11728@rochester.UUCP> ray@rochester.UUCP (Ray Frank) writes:
>> >Why doesn't the preacher say "and now the bride may kiss the groom?  
>> >Why is there no flower boy following the groom?
>> ...
>> 
>> You are living in the past.
>> The preacher does not say that the groom may kiss the bride,
>> in modern marriages between equals. Neither the bride nor the groom
>> wants such a thing said.
>
>Until you can show me undenialble proof that you and all of us know
>where we are going, I will choose to remain in the past, after all, the
>past worked and has spoken for itself (there wasn't a 50% divorce rate)
>the present doesn't look too healthy, and the future is cloaked in the
>vagueness of experimentation.

Well, let's be a little more real, here.  The average length of a
marriage around 100 years ago was approximately the same as it is now.
For a person to be married two or three times was considered normal.
However, ends of marriages were usually by death, not divorce.  The
institution of marriage evolved in a situation where "till death do us
part" was not so long a thing.  Whether people can, in general,
maintain a marriage over 50 to 75 years has yet to be seen, but the
institution must and will, at least, change to adapt to longer lives.
So perhaps the "unhealthy" divorce rate is quite normal and healthy for
the population.

Oh, by the way, spare me your examples of 60+ year marriages.  My
grandparents are still lovingly married after 67 years, and I, having
just entered into marriage, intend to surpass them.  Please note that I
am talking about people *in general*, i.e., the population on average.

		Ken Arnold


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