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Path: utzoo!utcsri!ray
From: ray@utcsri.UUCP (Raymond Allen)
Newsgroups: net.singles
Subject: Re: sensitivity
Message-ID: <1870@utcsri.UUCP>
Date: Mon, 30-Dec-85 12:31:47 EST
Article-I.D.: utcsri.1870
Posted: Mon Dec 30 12:31:47 1985
Date-Received: Mon, 30-Dec-85 12:42:24 EST
References: <14145@rochester.UUCP> <1849@uwmacc.UUCP> <1892@hao.UUCP> <362@l5.uucp> <266@unirot.UUCP>
Reply-To: ray@utcsri.UUCP (Raymond Allen)
Organization: CSRI, University of Toronto
Lines: 42
Summary: 

In article <266@unirot.UUCP> pooh@unirot.UUCP (Pooh) writes:

>I have a question for everyone:  WHY should these depressed people
>get over it?
>
>For you?  Is your best friend offending you by being depressed?
>Is it taking too long?  Do you hate to see someone depressed for
>a reason that only you know about?  And they won't even LISTEN
>to you when you try to tell them what their problem is.  Gosh.  <-- sarcasm
>
>How about for themselves?  How about letting your friend get
>over it when HE's good and ready, whatever that takes?  It's HIS
>depression, after all.  Help him if he wants it--but don't take
>it as a personal affront if he doesn't.
>
>Let's stop prescribing for other people and just work on what
>WE want to accomplish for ourselves.
>
	This would be fine if people would only keep *their* depression(s)
to themselves.  What may happen, however, is that depressed people insist
upon telling everyone in sight about how miserable their own life is and
how they wish they could do something about it but they can't because
someone or something won't let them and the entire human population
are a bunch of insensitive cretins and ... (etc. etc. ad nauseum).
[~ 1/8 of a :-)]

	I can understand someone wanting to wallow in self-pity.  I
have done it myself.  But I do feel that I have learned enough about
life to offer people some constructive suggestions as to how to live
a fuller, happier life (excuse the honey).  If someone is not interested
in listening to me (as is their right) then I believe that I have the
same right not to listen to them.

	Excuse me if the above statements sound inflammatory.  I am
not trying to bake anyone but I am trying to point out that
depressed, unhappy individuals often try to force everyone else
to share their misery while self-fulfilled, confident individuals
will try to help others help themselves.  By the way, I don't approve
of preaching.  I never offer advice unless it is asked for.
-- 
Ray Allen  | "A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it."
utcsri!ray | - Oscar Wilde as quoted in "Parachutes & Kisses" by Erica Jong