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Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!burl!ulysses!ucbvax!decvax!cca!diego
From: diego@cca.UUCP (Diego Gonzalez)
Newsgroups: net.social
Subject: Welcome back, Net.Social!
Message-ID: <5468@cca.UUCP>
Date: Fri, 3-Jan-86 11:20:03 EST
Article-I.D.: cca.5468
Posted: Fri Jan  3 11:20:03 1986
Date-Received: Sun, 5-Jan-86 01:10:58 EST
Organization: Computer Corp. of America, Cambridge
Lines: 64


             I originally wrote to the net concerning extra-marital
        activities of males vs. women's considerations in marriage in the
        hopes of rekindling discussion in the net.  At that time, I had
        not re-read Hite's books.  Since the topic has proven interesting
        to at least some NET.SOCIAL readers, I will recheck and print the
        actual excerpts from the two reports.

             When it first struck me that there might be a consistent
        difference between the expectations of partners in marriage and
        the reality (developed out of numerous conversations with male
        and female friends), I checked the best source of statistics that
        I knew of - the two Hite reports.  I was disappointed to discover
        that her approach had changed, at least in the presentation of
        information revealed by her surveys.  As a result, there are not
        directly corresponding statements regarding male and female
        extra-marital activities and attitudes.

             My impression was (note that I am not offering this as
        fact), however, that since women probably do not regard their
        fathers as "philanderers" but rather as [almost] idealistically
        upright and faithful (in the common sense).  (The term "father"
        can be taken to mean _f_a_t_h_e_r _f_i_g_u_r_e, which would include any male
        whose character and attitude toward mother or other female might
        be admired.) I think that the fairly broad attitude of women in
        the U. S. is something like:  "My father was faithful to my
        mother (only) and I expect my husband/SO to be likewise to me."
        In light of the 70% figure in Hite's report, I wonder if the
        basic anticipation is not at least a little naive.

             Anyhow, I will check the actual entries and post them to the
        net.  Perhaps that will remove some of the apples-oranges sense
        that the issue currently has.