Relay-Version: version B 2.10 5/3/83; site utzoo.UUCP Posting-Version: version B 2.10.3 4.3bsd-beta 6/6/85; site pyrnj.uucp Path: utzoo!watmath!clyde!cbosgd!ihnp4!houxm!whuxl!whuxlm!akgua!gatech!ut-sally!topaz!pyrnj!romain From: romain@pyrnj.uucp (Romain Kang) Newsgroups: net.jokes Subject: Should this have gone to net.bio? (:-) Message-ID: <157@pyrnj.uucp> Date: Tue, 7-Jan-86 18:57:50 EST Article-I.D.: pyrnj.157 Posted: Tue Jan 7 18:57:50 1986 Date-Received: Thu, 9-Jan-86 00:05:31 EST Organization: Pyramid Technology Corp, Woodbridge, NJ Lines: 101 TUBERS Niels E. Nielsen For some time in the past few days, I had noticed an evil, hard-to-describe smell emanating from the basement. Upon further examination, I discovered that some of the potatoes in our bin had rotted. A closer look at the decayed flesh revealed a strange, green discoloration, occurring particularly at the eyes of the potatoes. Determined to get at the root of the matetr (so to speak), I took one of the offending tubers to a good friend of mine who had ready access to an organic chemistry lab in the city. She was able to succesfully culture the green discharge or growth, whatever it was, and declared it a mystery. "I have never seen a biological agent of this kind," she said. "It is not a mold, a slime, an animal, or any of the ordinary microbiotic organisms with which my professional career is concerned." Her inability to uncover the nature of the rot left me greatly disturbed, for I had great faith in her ability as a biochemist and a laboratory sleuth. In fact, my friend's reputation had been made late in the last century by a startling discovery of a new pathenogen previously unknown to our science. Nevertheless, I chose to accept her verdict and discarded the now thoroughly inedible potatoes. The next day, I checked the bin of potatoes once again to ascertain their health now that the offending members hed been removed. The remaining tubers were without blemish, so I was prepared to consider the matter closed. Even to this day, when I request potatoes (at home or in one of the finer New York restaurants), I do so with a twinge of memory for the mysterious, undeciphered green substance once found on some of mine. Many years later, whilst on a sfari in the further regions of Upper Volta, I came upon an old wise man who, for the one of the smaller gold coins of the realm, would answer any mystery, question, connundrum, query, or request placed before him by the anxious interloper. At once, I placed a coin in his filthy begging bowl and made my quandry know to him. "Kind sir," I began, "My life has been without true peace since a certain, obscure event in my later youth." "You see," I continued, For some time in the past few days, I had noticed an evil, hard-to-describe smell emanating from the basement." "Yes, my son?" the old man rejoindered, "Don't you think I was there, in that very bin of which you are about to speak?" I gasped in horror. "Father! Is it truly you? After all these years and not one word from you! You should be ashamed of yourself." "I know, buckaroo, but I had to get away." "Father, this is getting us nowhere; I'm leaving." This I did forthwith and sailed home only to discover that... For some time in the past few days, I had noticed an evil, hard-to-describe smell emanating from the basement. Upon further examination, I discovered that some of the potatoes in our bin had rotted. A closer look at the decayed flesh revealed a strange, green discoloration, occurring particularly at the eyes of the potatoes. Determined to get at the root of the matetr (so to speak), I took one of the offending tubers to a good friend of mine who had ready access to an organic chemistry lab in the city. She was able to succesfully culture the green discharge or growth, whatever it was, and declared it a mystery. "I have never seen a biological agent of this kind," she said. "It is not a mold, a slime, an animal, or any of the ordinary microbiotic organisms with which my professional career is concerned." Her inability to uncover the nature of the rot left me greatly disturbed, for I had great faith in her ability as a biochemist and a laboratory sleuth. In fact, my friend's reputation had been made late in the last century by a startling discovery of a new pathenogen previously unknown to our science. Nevertheless, I chose to accept her verdict and discarded the now thoroughly inedible potatoes. The next day, I checked the bin of potatoes once again to ascertain their health now that the offending members hed been removed. The remaining tubers were without blemish, so I was prepared to consider the matter closed. Even to this day, when I request potatoes (at home or in one of the finer New York restaurants), I do so with a twinge of memory for the mysterious, undeciphered green substance once found on some of mine. -- Romain Kang, Pyramid Technology Corporation US Mail: 900 Route 9, Woodbridge, NJ 07095 Ma Bell: (201) 750-2626 UUCPnet: {allegra,cmcl2,pyramid,topaz}!pyrnj!romain "Eggheads unite! You have nothing to lose but your yolks!" -Adlai Stevenson