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From: krantz@csd2.UUCP (Michaelntz)
Newsgroups: net.jokes
Subject: Re: new subject
Message-ID: <3050022@csd2.UUCP>
Date: Sun, 12-Jan-86 14:57:00 EST
Article-I.D.: csd2.3050022
Posted: Sun Jan 12 14:57:00 1986
Date-Received: Tue, 14-Jan-86 06:09:11 EST
References: <261@galbp.UUCP>
Organization: New York University
Lines: 86

> In article <261@galbp.UUCP> bing@galbp.UUCP (Bing Bang) writes:
>>
>>i have a new subject for this group;
>>
>>
>>how many times did you say "so-and-so should be taken out and shot?"
>>well, let's make a list of so-and-so's...

> I have my own nominations:

I have MY own nominations:

* Robin Quivers
* Joan Rivers
* Ed Meese
* Donald Regan
* the cast of "Who's the Boss?"
* evening I/O operators
* the entire New York University Bursar's office 
* the entire Upper West Side, with the exceptions of David Byrne,
  Yoko Ono, and my friends Niki and Judy
* for that matter, include Yoko Ono, as punishment for wearing
  an IMAGINE sweatshirt and contemplating an appearance on "All
  My Children"
* cars who honk during gridlock
* the Refridgerator
* George Will
* Michael Douglas (for taking Kathleen Turner to court and forcing
  her to film "Jewel Of the Nile")
* Michael Douglas (for his embarrassing performance as Zach in
  "A Chorus Line")
* Michael Douglas (just for his cloying, shit-eating grin.  Just
  for that.)
* Ed Koch (for almost anything he's said or done since 1983)
* SPECIAL ROAST-OVER-A-SLOW-FIRE AWARD:  Young urban punks with
  $1000 worth of designer new wave clothing on who stand smoking
  clove cigarettes on the corner of Bleecker and Avenue Of The
  Americas and beg change for the subway back to SoHo.  And then
  say "Fuck you," when you say no.
* Michael Landon, for crimes against hair
* Jane Pauley, just because
* Diane Keaton, for not saying hello to me when I greeted her on
  Fifth Ave (I'm just kidding.  She doesn't belong here, even if
  she did blow me off)
* Lionel Ritchie, for saying during an interview on Live At five
  that writing "We Are The World" was an especially remarkable
  acheivement, because "with all those talented people waiting
  on me, it just HAD to be a great song."
* My friend Niki, the writer, for refusing to read Ann Beattie
  just to irritate me.
* Ann Beattie, for writing "Love Always"
* afternoon I/O operators
* Xerox Star installers
* whoever murdered net.bizarre
* Rich Rosen's ego
* Oleg Cassini, for his name
* all landlords, with pincers
* Andrea Dworkin, for crimes against humanity, media, and the
  cause of feminism
* people who justify their being on the express line by claiming
  that four baggies containing grapes, zucchini, broccoli, and
  onions, all of which must be weighed seperately, come under
  the heading of Perishables as one item.
* break dancers
* Pee Wee Herman
* morning I/O operators
* whoever broke my glasses
* whoever invented contact lenses
* whoever invented UUCP
* all those who use UUCP
* all those who flamed me for posting LBJ's
* Bryant Gumbel
* Anita Bryant
* Brian Kaufman (old synagogue offense, never mind)
* Eric Dickerson
* all those who open with the Queen's Pawn
* that guy who sued J.R. Reynolds for his cancer
* General Dynamics, en masse
* E.F. Hutton, ditto
* all white-collar criminals who dont go to jail


Gee.  This does get habit-forming, doesn't it?

- mike krantz